


A Gentleman's Guide to Automata and Aether

by QianLan



Series: Historical AUs [4]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Steampunk, Inventor!Poe, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-17
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-05 01:58:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10294901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QianLan/pseuds/QianLan
Summary: A daring Balloonist/Inventor.A brave and dedicated Renegade.A clever automaton that's unlike anything the world has ever seen before...Or a steampunk Stormpilot story where Poe's reluctantly drug back into the fight and Finn's just trying to do the right thing.COMPLETE





	1. Finn

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pudding (pudding_and_poison)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pudding_and_poison/gifts).



> I won an art commission from the wonderful [@pudding](http://the-pudding-is-a-lie.tumblr.com/) for [Fandom Trumps Hate](https://fandomtrumpshateofferings.tumblr.com/). I asked for a steampunk Stormpilot (or as @pudding and I now call it, "Steampilot") and the moment I saw the first rough sketch, I started writing this fic.
> 
> I can't even begin to do [@pudding's finished work](http://the-pudding-is-a-lie.tumblr.com/post/158516691287/so-i-finally-managed-to-finish-my-contribution) the justice it deserves, but one look at it and I had to write something...

 

 

 **Late 19 th ****Century Europe** : a new scourge is rising on the continent.  While air ships patrol overhead, children are being kidnapped off the streets, kings and presidents are being threatened, and everywhere there are rumors of squads of gleaming white automatons killing anyone who asks too many questions. 

 

They’re called the First Order. 

 

Their aim?  To eradicate the chaos of the modern world and install a new Empire across Europe and eventually, the world.

 

But there are those who push back against the Order, those who refuse to go down without a fight.  In England, one such group—the Queen’s secret service, known to some as The Resistance—is led by the indomitable General Leia Organa.  The Resistance is full of Europe’s best and brightest: there are the daring hot-air Balloonists, who travel across Europe keeping the skies safe, as well as the fearless foot soldiers, the Renegades, who use their smarts to keep the Order at bay.

 

But now, rumors swirl that Leia’s own son, Ben Solo, is designing a new machine for the First Order—something deadly, something with a wide reach, something that might wipe out most of Europe if the Resistance isn’t careful.

 

Times are desperate, so Leia sends her most trusted Renegade on a journey to find an old ally and possibly a new device that might tilt this war in the Resistance’s favor.

 

The young Renegade has found the man he’s looking for—an inventor named Poe Dameron—and that’s when things start getting interesting…

 

* * *

 

 

**Just outside Firenze, Italy, 1893:**

The door creaked open and a man with wild curly hair poked his head out.  He was wearing a set of oversized goggles that exaggerated the size of his eyes as he made a show of looking the man standing before him up and down.  His eyes came back to rest on the stranger’s face. “We’re not interested,” he said.

 

He went to slam the door when a tall golden boot blocked it from closing.  A gloved hand began pushing the door open.  “You’ll make time for me, _Signor Inventore_.”  The man shoved his way in and then slammed the door behind them.

 

A revolver sprung from inside the Inventor’s ruffled right sleeve into his hand.  “I don’t think so.”

 

The other man was now face to face with a rather large gun.  He raised his hands.  “Woah, woah, woah!  My apologies! But time is of the essence.  I have a message for you, sir.”

 

“You can tell it to me leaving,” the Inventor said.  He nodded to the door.

 

The other man stood his ground.  “You are Poe Dameron, the Balloonist, correct?”

 

The Inventor bristled.  “Not anymore.”

 

“Well, you are Poe Dameron?”

 

“Sometimes,” the Inventor said.

 

The other man smiled.  “I have a message from General Organa.”

 

The Inventor groaned.  “No.”

 

“What?”

 

“No.”

 

The man looked to his vest pocket, indicating he had something there.  The Inventor nodded reluctantly.  The man quickly unbuckled two buckles so he could reach past his cravat to pull out an ivory-colored envelope. 

 

The seal on the back was unmistakable.  The Inventor frowned.  _Why are you doing this to me, Leia?_ He lowered his gun as the man held out the letter.  The Inventor took it with a harsh tug.  He broke open the seal and scanned the letter. 

 

He didn’t really read it, just let certain words filter up.  _Danger...New device…Upmost urgency…Please…_

_Please._

 

The Inventor closed his eyes and sighed.  He walked back into the room, muttering.  From what the other man could hear, he was arguing with himself.

 

Finally, the Inventor spun on his heel and walked to the other man, taking him by the arm and turning him so he could shove him out the door.  “I thank you for your pains, Mister?  You know what, I don’t care.  Just please tell Leia that I extend my greetings, but I am otherwise engaged.”

 

“No,” the other man said, shrugging out of the Inventor’s grip.  “I’m afraid that won’t do.”  His voice was soft, polite, but there was a subtle edge to it.  This was a man who didn’t back down easily.  He stepped further into the workshop, trying to avoid the springs and glass jars that littered the floor.  “Mr. Dameron, it has taken me eight weeks to find you, and—”

 

“I don’t care.”  The Inventor held up the letter.  “I don’t do this anymore.”

 

The other man frowned.  “She said if the letter didn’t work to tell you that Ben is building a weapon.”

 

The Inventor froze.  He pushed the goggles up to the top of his head, making his hair even more of a mess.  “What?”

 

For a split second, the other man was at a loss for words.  Poe Dameron had beautiful eyes.  Absolutely beautiful eyes. 

 

Poe repeated, “What?”

 

The other man suddenly remembered his place. He cleared his throat and said, “The General asked me to tell you that Ben is building a weapon.  He has a benefactor.  A man who heads a group called the First Order.  His name is Lord Snoke, and his associates, well… they’re evil.  We’ve already had—”

 

“I know about the Order,” Poe said quietly, running a hand through his hair and dragging the goggles off his head.  “Kriffing hell,” he whispered.  He let the goggles fall to the floor as he closed his eyes, just barely shaking his head. 

 

“Kriffing hell,” he suddenly yelled.  He walked away from the other man.  “Kriffing, kriffing, kriffing hell!”

 

He paced back to the other man.  “Did she give you a timeline?”

 

“A timeline?  No, but we think it will be soon.  The General said you might have something that would help us stop him?”

 

Poe turned to look back to the second floor of his workshop with a sigh.  “I might,” he said quietly.  _How did she know?_

 

“Good,” the other man said.  “So you’ll help?”

 

Poe turned back around.  He bit his lip.  “It isn’t that simple.  I…”  He shook his head.  “I don’t do this sort of thing anymore.”

 

The other man stepped forward.  “People are dying.”

 

Poe’s hands were shaking.  “I understand, but…”

 

“But?  Did you not hear me?  People are dying!”

 

Poe looked up into the other man’s eyes.  The man looked so earnest, so sure. 

 

“Please,” the man said.

 

 _It won’t be like last time_ , Poe told himself. 

 

“Please,” the man repeated, barely above a whisper.

 

Poe felt his resolve melt.  _Does he have to look so fragging sincere?_   He felt himself nodding, heard himself say, “Fine.”

 

“Good,” the other man said, taking Poe’s arm and maneuvering him further into the workshop.  “Because we need to be quick.”

 

Poe frowned.  “What?  Why?”

 

“I might have run afoul of a group of First Order scouts about two towns over and—”

 

“Kriffing hell,” Poe said, sprinting towards the stairs.

 

“Exactly,” the other man said, quick on his heels.

 

He followed Poe to the second floor, which was even messier than the first. Everywhere the man looked there were tables and shelves littered with papers and small metal devices. There were dirty plates stacked on top of books, half-full teacups next to piles of wire and gears—it was distressing to look at, let alone navigate—but then, in the middle of the first room at the top of the stairs, there was a pristine space.  On top of an immaculately clean table sat a small circular device.  Well, two devices, actually: one large orb and one small half circle, both shining gold and copper.  The small half-circle’s wiring was exposed. 

 

“I have to put her back together before we can move her,” Poe said.  He began fitting the smaller device on top of the larger one.

 

The other man nodded, turning and walking back to the hall, his eyes trained on the front door downstairs.

 

“So, you’re one of Leia’s people,” Poe called after him.

 

The man looked back into the room.  “Renegade, first class.”

 

Poe looked almost pained by that.  He nodded and went back to work on the device in front of him.  _Of course he’s a Renegade_ , Poe thought.  _Look at him._   _I’m guessing he could take on a squadron of Stormtroopers single-handed._

 

“You were one of her Balloonists, right?”

 

 _Poe Dameron, head of the Black Squadron Balloon Brigade.  Best in the land.  Best in any land. _“Something like that,” Poe said.  He took a deep breath and forced the past to stay out of his mind.  _Focus, Dameron. Focus!_

 

“They say you were the best.”

 

 _I was._   Poe let out a sad chuckle.  _Was_.  “That was a long time ago, my friend.”

 

“Of course,” the Renegade said.  He watched the inventor moving his hands quickly over the device, connecting wires and gears—it was its own sort of ballet, beautiful and intricate.  He smiled as the inventor began humming as he worked. 

 

The Inventor— _Poe_ , the Renegade reminded himself—was a legend in the Resistance.  Those who knew him had described a cunning Balloonist, a reckless, fearless leader who’d flown in dozens of missions.  But the man standing before him now just didn’t fit that image.  Sure, the clothes were impeccable.  His cropped jacket fit snuggly in all the right places.  _Focus_ , the Renegade reminded himself.  But the workshop was a disaster, the hair was a mess, and the man was downright frazzled.

 

 _Poe Dameron is not what I expected._   The Renegade shook his head as he turned back towards the front door.  _Let’s hope he’s still up for a fight._

 

Poe lost track of time as he worked, so he didn’t notice when the Renegade slipped out of the room and went downstairs to make sure the house was locked up.  However, he did notice when the man came running up the stairs two at a time.  “They’re at the other end of the lane,” he said.

 

The magnifying glasses Poe was wearing kept slipping down his nose.  “Blast,” he whispered.  “Blast, blast, blast!”  His hands were furiously twisting and turning a wrench, trying to fasten the last of the bolts in place.

 

The Renegade spared a worried look into the room.  “I don’t mean to rush you, but they’re going to be here any minute.”

 

“I know!  I know,” Poe said.  The wrench hit the floor with a clang.  “Blast it all to hell!”

 

“Dameron!”

 

“I know!”

 

The Renegade looked back towards the front door.  He pulled his revolver from its holster and held it, waiting for any indication that the dreaded Stormtroopers had found them.

 

“There,” Poe exclaimed, standing up.  “She’s ready.”

 

“Good,” the Renegade said, moving into the room.  “Pack your things.  We’ll leave through there.”  He nodded to a door on the other side of the room.

 

There was a loud thud and then a groan of buckling wood downstairs.  The Renegade gave Poe a worried glance and ran towards the noise.

 

There was no mistaking the mechanical sound of Stormtroopers, the most sophisticated automatons on the continent.  Each step of every machine in precise harmony with the next.  The Renegade looked down—they were tearing through the front door. 

 

He ran back.  “We need to leave.  Now!”

 

Poe nodded.  The magnifying glasses slipped off his nose and shattered on the floor. 

 

“Hope you didn’t need those.”  The Renegade grabbed Poe’s arm and began pulling him towards the back.

 

Poe shrugged out of the other man’s grasp.  “Not without…”  He grabbed the round clockwork contraption he’d been working on, hugging it to him like a proud papa.  “This is what you came for, Renegade.”

 

The Renegade shook his head.  _Whatever that is, it had better be worth all of this._

 

They ran out the back door.  The Renegade started down the fire stairs when Poe yelled, “Up!”

 

“Up?”

 

Poe pointed to the roof.  Hovering over them was a small two-person balloon.

 

“Oh you have to be kidding me,” the Renegade said. 

 

“Up,” Poe said, already starting up the steps.

 

“Up,” the Renegade muttered.  “Idiot is going to get us killed.”

 

Crates littered the roof and there was a small wooden dock off to one side where the balloon was tethered. 

 

The Renegade studied it.  “Wait, is that a…?”

 

“Yes,” Poe said as he placed his device and some other equipment in the balloon’s basket. 

 

It was a special forces TIE Balloon, rigged with—if the Renegade had to guess—enough fire power to take down one of those really big dirigibles they called Star Destroyers.  The TIEs were military class balloons, not available to the general public.  “How do you have one of those, Poe?  They’re illegal!”

 

Poe turned and smiled.  “I know.”

 

He threw open a crate and began pulling out more equipment to put into the basket, asking over his shoulder, “Are you any good with a balloon?”

 

“Guns, yes.  Flying, no.  That’s your department.”

 

They could hear the Stormtroopers marching through the workshop below them.

 

Poe started untying the balloon’s tethers.  “Grab that small chest,” he said with a nod behind the Renegade.  “And put it in the basket.”

 

As the Renegade did that, Poe continued with the tethers.  “You’ll climb in and then I’ll cut these last two tethers as I get in.  There’ll be a jerk and then we’ll be airborne.  Got it?”

 

The Renegade nodded.  “Got it.”

 

The Stormtroopers crashed through the back door. 

 

“Good,” Poe said, speeding up.  “I’ll teach you how to man the guns once we’re away.  Okay, so go ahead and get in—”

 

The Renegade yelled and pushed Poe behind a crate just as a bullet whizzed by.  The Stormtroopers were firing on them.  The Renegade crouched and began returning fire.  “Cut the tethers and go.”

 

“You aren’t in the basket yet!”

 

“ _I_ don’t matter.  _You_ have to get to the Resistance.”

 

Poe grumbled and cut the first tether.  He then wrapped the final tether rope around his hand.  “Renegade!”

 

The man turned and Poe grabbed for him just as he cut the tether free.  The Renegade lurched forward, nearly dropping his gun.  “Fragging hell, Dameron!”  But then he felt the pull from Poe’s hand.  “Poe!”

 

Poe was rising, but he had a steel grip on the Renegade’s arm.  “Grab the rope,” Poe yelled.

 

The Renegade did just that as they lifted completely off the roof.

 

A few seconds later, they were both floating above Poe’s workshop, dangling from a hot air balloon.

 

The Renegade felt exposed, and he was thankful that Stormtroopers weren’t programmed to readjust quickly.  Most of them were still repositioning themselves to fire at the new angle.  He could hear the cranking of gears, even from the air.  _Please say we’ll be out of range before they’re ready to fire_.

 

A few Stormtroopers clanked into their new positions and started firing.  The Renegade could feel the shots zooming past.  “Kriff,” he screamed.

 

“Just a bit further.”

 

“Just a bit further and what,” the Renegade yelled.

 

“And we’ll be out of range.  Those things are notoriously bad after about fifty yards or so.”

 

“Yes, but,” the Renegade said, “all it takes is one lucky robot.”

 

Poe laughed.  “Who needs luck when we’ve got science on our side?”

 

“Oh please,” the Renegade groaned.  But at the same time, he noticed that there were no more shots zooming by.  _Thank the maker!_

 

“See,” said Poe from above him.

 

“Great!  Will you climb up now please?”

 

“Sure,” Poe said, starting up.  “You never told me your name.”

 

“Now?!?” the Renegade yelled up.  “Why don’t we talk about it when we’re not dangling from a rope three hundred feet in the air?”

 

“But what should I call you?”

 

“Whatever you want,” the Renegade yelled, clinging just a bit tighter to the rope.

 

“What’s your name?”

 

“I don’t have one.”

 

“What do you mean you don’t have one?

 

“I mean, I don’t have one.  They never gave me one.  I have a serial number.”

 

“What?!?!”  Poe stopped and looked down at his companion.  “Wait!  Are you an…”

 

“Maker, no!” the Renegade said.  “I’m flesh and bone.”  _Mostly._   “They just don’t name people where I’m from, and no one in the Resistance has come up with anything I like yet.”

 

“So what do they call you?”

 

“Mostly ‘Eight-Seven.’  Some just call me ‘Renegade’ or ‘Big Deal’.”

 

“Big Deal?”

 

“Long story.”

 

Poe shook his head.  “So, what was your serial number?”

 

“FN-2187.”

 

Poe scrunched his brow and thought. 

 

A particularly strong gust pushed them to the left and Poe could hear the Renegade yelling below him.  “Will you climb already?”

 

Poe looked down.  “Of course.”  He smiled.  “Finn.”

 

“Finn?”

 

“Your name.  At least until you figure out something better.”

 

The Renegade smiled despite himself.  _Finn?_  

 

 _Finn._  

 

“I like it,” he yelled up.  “Finn,” he said as if trying it on.  “Good to meet you Poe.”

 

“Good to meet you, too, Finn.”

 

Another gust sent them swinging far to the right.  Finn closed his eyes, grasping at the rope and silently repeating the mantra, _don’t look down_.

 

Poe’s voice from above admonished, “Come on.  It’s worse down there, I promise.”

 

Finn nodded and looked up.  Poe was nearly in the basket.

 

Finn started pulling himself up, smiling to himself.  _Finn._

 

 


	2. Incredible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which our daring heroes are stuck together in a balloon (for better or for worse) and the First Order tries to shoot them out of the skies.

 

 

It felt like forever before Finn hoisted himself up over the side of the basket.  He didn’t even bother to look around.  He simply sank to the floor where he’d landed and started taking huge breaths.

 

“Not a fan of the balloons, I take it?”  Poe was busy pulling levers and pushing buttons.

 

Finn shook his head and then finally managed a “No.”

 

Poe laughed.

 

“Do you have coordinates for me?”

 

Finn nodded and held out a slip of paper.  Poe took it and began humming as he punched them in.  Soon, Finn could hear gears turning and something began rumbling as the fan propelling the balloon started turning.  He closed his eyes and leaned back against the basket’s frame.

 

Poe turned and studied the Renegade.  The man had dark skin, and even with the bowler, Poe could tell that his dark hair was short, cropped close to the head.  While the button-down under the man’s tight leather vest was a bit loose, Poe felt his cheeks heat up as he realized how…well-proportioned his new friend was. 

 

Poe shook his head and tried to do the math, _he can’t be more than…what?  Twenty-five?  If that._   _Maker, she’s recruiting them young_ , Poe thought ruefully.  The boy’s eyes were closed and he was working to steady his breathing.  _Young and beautiful_ , Poe thought.  _Young and beautiful, with the prettiest lips I think I’ve ever seen_.  Poe sighed.  _Young and on a mission, Dameron_. 

_He’s not here for you.  He’s here for Bee…_   Poe grimaced and shook his head, ridding it of any budding fantasies he might have been about to entertain.

 

After about a minute, Finn heard Poe sit down next to him.  “So before,” Poe asked.

 

“Hmmmm?”  Finn opened his eyes.  “Before?”

 

“You said where you grew up, they didn’t give you a name.”

 

“Oh,” Finn looked down at his feet.  “That.”  He took a deep breath.  “I used to be…  I mean, I was…”

 

“First Order,” Poe said quietly.

 

“Yes,” Finn said.  “Until two years ago.”  He began playing with his gloves.

 

“How did you get out?”

 

Finn smiled.  “One of Leia’s operatives.  Do you know Rey?  Rey Kenobi?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “Must be after my time.”

 

“Well, she and I ended up stranded outside of Cairo.” He laughed.  “I hate Cairo.  Well, not Cairo itself, but all the desert around it.  Anyway, when I met Rey, I already knew what the Order did was wrong, and I knew I needed to leave, but…”  He kicked his foot forward.  “She helped me get away.”

 

“That’s good of her,” Poe said.  He sat for a few moments before asking, “I always thought their program was entirely automated.  I mean, not the officers and not the Balloonists, obviously.”

 

“Obviously,” Finn smirked.

 

Poe rolled his eyes.  “But I didn’t know…”

 

“They need bodies to build the weapons and to program the Stormtroopers.  And they need bodies to go where the automatons can’t.”

 

Poe shook his head again.  _They have people doing that?_ It was too much to take in.  Eventually, he asked, “So you’ve built things, right?  That must mean you’re good with your hands?”

 

_Hands._

 

Finn’s hands tightened into fists as he shook his head.  “No.  I’m better with a gun.  I think that’s why the General put me in the Renegades.  I was infantry with the Order, mostly.”

 

“Oh.”  Poe let that settle for a moment.  “Leia’s good at putting people where they’ll fit.”

 

Finn shook his head.

 

“What?”

 

“You call her Leia.”

 

Poe smiled.  “She’s not my General anymore.  And I’ve known her since I was a child.”

 

“Still…”

 

“Still, nothing.  I’m not back in the Resistance, Finn.  I’m only helping.  Temporarily.”  Poe scowled.  _This is such a bad idea._

 

“Why did you leave,” Finn asked.

 

Poe sighed and looked up into the glowing balloon.  After a few moments, he shrugged.  “I don’t know.  Why does anyone ever quit something?”

 

Finn chuckled.

 

“What?”

 

“You admit you quit?”

 

“That’s what I just said.”

 

“Quitting is giving up.”

 

Poe pushed himself up.  “Not you, too.  Look,” he said, dusting himself off.  “I agreed to come, didn’t I?  I don’t need you trying to guilt me back in, okay?  I got enough of that when I left.”

 

Finn put his hands up.  “Sorry.”  As Poe pretended to look over the hydraulics system, Finn said, “I just never figured the famous Poe Dameron, Balloonist extraordinaire, was a quitter.”

 

Poe picked up a wrench and looked around.  He put it back down with a clang.  Finally, he hit the side of the basket with his hand.  “That’s not who I am anymore.”

 

“Obviously.”

 

Poe spun.  “I got someone killed, Finn, someone I cared about and…  Why am I telling you this?  What are you, twenty?  What would you know about anything?”

 

Finn kept his smile in place.  “I’m twenty-three.”

 

_Kriff!_   “Well, talk to me when you’re thirty.”

 

Finn chuckled.  “I’ll be sure to do that, sir.”

 

Poe turned to the control panel.  He shut his eyes, forcing the memory of Muran’s death out of his mind. 

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn shivered in the evening breeze.  Sitting inside the basket, things were cozy, but standing—as he was now—things were far less warm.  And it wasn’t only the weather.  Finn spared another look in Poe’s direction.  The other man hadn’t spoken in over an hour.

 

Finn had read the files on Dameron before agreeing to the mission.  Poe had been recruited into the Balloon Corps at 16.  He’d been leading them by the time he was 24.  By all accounts, Commander Dameron was the best pilot of his generation and a talented tinkerer as well.  Several of his automaton designs were still being used by the Queen’s Resistance.

 

Furthermore, Poe had been there when Ben Solo was still a member of the Resistance.  In fact, he’d been present that fateful day Ben had broken with his family and the service for good.  He’d also been there when reports started filtering in that Ben was working for enemies of the Queen.  Poe and Ben had been close friends growing up, and all intel suggested that Poe took his friend’s defection to heart. 

 

Then, two years later, one of Poe’s squad mates—and if the rumors were to be believed, his lover—Lt. Muran was killed in a dogfight with anti-royals in France.  Everyone who had been there that day said Poe did everything he could, but Poe blamed himself. 

 

Then, a month later, he’d argued with General Organa and simply walked away.  He’d told no one where he was going or how to contact him.  He’d even left his beloved balloon, Black One, behind.

 

Poe had disappeared.  And for five years, no one in the Resistance knew where he was.

 

Then, eight weeks ago, the General had sent Finn to find him.  He’d followed all sorts of rumors across the continent and then, just over a week ago, he’d discovered Dameron living outside Florence, keeping to himself, inventing and building little playthings for the local children. 

 

Poe didn’t seem to have any close friends.  He hadn’t married or taken a lover as far as Finn could tell.  He was simply tinkering in isolation.

 

_How do you leave,_ Finn wondered.

_How do you ignore what the Order is trying to do to Europe?_

 

Finn stared at the inventor.  The man had laugh lines next to his eyes, but he struck Finn as someone who hadn’t laughed in a long while.  Finn bit his cheek and wondered what wasn’t in the files.  _What really happened, Poe?_

 

Poe turned and caught him staring.  “Yes?”

 

“I wanted to apologize.  For earlier.  I shouldn’t have spoken out of turn,” Finn said, crossing over to Poe.

 

Poe shook his head.  “I thought I’d left that life behind.”  He stared out at the rapidly darkening sky.  “I’d hoped I could let it all be.”

 

“Did that really help?”

 

Poe turned to Finn.  _Who are you?_   “No, it didn’t.”

 

“I didn’t figure it would.  Running away rarely does.”

 

Poe opened his mouth to say something, but Finn said, “And I may be young, but I do know about _that_.  From personal experience.  You aren’t the only one who’s ever run away, Poe.”  He stared off into the twilight.  “I’m very good at running myself.”

 

Poe stared at Finn.  _Really, who are you?_   “I’m starting to figure out why Leia sent you.”

 

Finn snorted.  “To tell the truth, she said I was your type.”

 

Poe blushed.  _Dammit, Leia!_   “Yeah, well…”  Poe shook his head.  _Change the fragging subject.  Now!!!!!!_ He clapped his hands together.  “Want to see something extraordinary?”

 

Finn smiled.  “Always.”

 

Poe walked to his device.  He pressed a few buttons and flipped a switch and then walked back to Finn.

 

“So what is this thing exactly?  And why does the General have me traveling over half the continent to fetch it?”

 

“I thought you were fetching me,” Poe said.

  
Finn rolled his eyes.  “Just tell me about this thing, Dameron.”

 

Poe smiled that maniacal smile of his as Finn heard gears spinning and the whir of the automaton seemingly coming to life.  “This is Beebee-Ate.  She’s a Beebee unit, but she’s not just the same ol’ Beebee unit, see?”  He whistled and the automaton rolled towards him.  “Come here, Bee.”  When it stopped, he patted its dome.  “Good girl!”  He turned to Finn “See, I’ve fitted her with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator.  She’s also got an internal self-correcting gyroscopic propulsion system, and—”

 

“Anything you can tell me in English?”

 

Poe laughed.  “Beebee-ate is an automaton who can think for herself.” 

 

Finn’s eyes went wide.  He’d grown up around Stormtroopers, of course, but those things had to be programmed for every single mission they were sent on.  They were effective, but that was because of their numbers—in reality, they were clunky, inelegant machines.  But this?  If Poe was telling the truth…

 

“Can’t you, dear,” Poe cooed to the machine.  The machine adjusted and then dinged.

 

Finn stepped back.  “Did that thing just…”

 

Poe chuckled.  “Bee, why don’t you introduce yourself to Finn?”

 

The machine rolled over to Finn and moved so that the top sphere now appeared to be looking at him.  It then let forth a series of clicks and dings before a small slip of paper began feeding out of her side.

 

Finn kneeled and reached out for the paper.  He looked to Poe.  “For me?”

 

Poe nodded.

 

Finn took the paper.  On it, in basic programming code, it said: [Pleased to meet you, Friend-Finn.]

 

Finn laughed.  “Pleased to meet you, too, Beebee-ate.”  He turned to Poe.  “Well, I’ll be damned.”

  
**# # # #**

 

That night, after Poe had Bee power down, everything was eerily quiet, save the turning of the propeller on the far side of the basket.  Finn spent as much time as possible sitting.  He wasn’t used to balloons and looking out into the inky blackness gave him the worst kind of vertigo.

 

Poe, however, was cackling and smiling and—to Finn’s dismay—leaning over the basket’s edge just taking it all in.  He turned towards Finn, his arms spread wide.  “Isn’t it gorgeous?”

 

“Sure,” Finn said.  “It’s great.”

 

Poe shook his head and turned back towards the night sky.  “I’ll never understand those beings who don’t want to be up here amongst the stars.”

 

Finn smiled. 

 

“You should sleep,” Poe said over his shoulder.

 

“Hmmmmm?”

 

“You should sleep.  I’ll take first watch.”

 

“What about you?”

 

Poe looked back at him, grinning.  “I’m not gonna sleep on a night as clear as this.”  He sighed as he turned back to it.  “Too much to see.”

 

_That sounds like the Poe Dameron I’ve heard stories about._   Finn leaned back and closed his eyes.  “Wake me in the morning, so you can get some sleep.”

 

“Will do,” Poe said.

 

**# # # #**

 

Someone was nudging his side, trying to rouse him _.  Oh kriff, I’ve overslept_ , Finn thought.  _They’re going to send me to reconditioning_.  He jumped up and rammed straight into Poe.  They toppled over into a mess of limbs. 

 

For one brief moment, he couldn’t help but reflect on how nice it felt, pressing into Dameron’s surprisingly sturdy frame.  As their noses brushed, Finn’s mind caught up.  _Not in the Order anymore, soldier._ Then his brain told him, _And your lips are far too close to—_ Finn blushed.  “Sorry,” he said, quickly pushing himself up off Poe.  “Sometimes I forget where I am.”

 

Poe took in a quick breath and then forced himself to chuckle.  “No worries.”  He sat up—all kinds of thoughts running through his mind before he closed his eyes and shook his head.  He took a deep breath, opened his eyes and reached for Finn, who helped pull him up.  He dusted himself off and then repeated, “No worries.”  He surveyed the sky.  “It’s been quiet all night.”

 

“Let’s hope it stays that way,” Finn said walking to the edge of the basket and venturing a look over the side.  He gulped and stepped back.  _That’s a long way down_.

 

Poe smiled.  “Fear of heights?”

 

“Fear of falling,” Finn said.

 

Poe laughed.

 

“I take it that’s never been a problem for you?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “No.  I grew up with it.  My mother was part of the Royal Balloon Brigades.  She was taking me up in her balloon before I could walk.”

 

“And your father?”

 

“He was more like you.  Preferred his feet on the ground.”

 

“As nature intended it,” Finn muttered.

 

Poe laughed loudly.  “That’s exactly what he says.”  He looked over at his young companion.  _You’re a lot like dad, actually_.

 

“What,” Finn asked, ducking away from Poe’s scrutiny.

 

Poe shook his head.  “I just sometimes forget not everyone is as enamored of the aether as I am.”  He stared out across the cloudless sky.  “It’s like the sea, I suppose, but…”  He turned and put his back to the edge of the basket.  “Somehow better?  I don’t know.  It’s endless and mysterious and only a few people ever get to really experience it.”  He looked up into the glowing balloon.  “I always feel special…honored that I get to do this, you know?”

 

Finn stared.  Poe’s eyes were so wide and full of wonder, it was damn near painful.

 

Poe looked at Finn and remembered himself.  “But yeah, I get that it’s not for everyone.”

 

“I’d never thought about it like that,” Finn said softly.  He looked out across the sky.  “It’s nice.”

 

Poe watched Finn stare out at the horizon, earnestly trying to see what Poe saw, and he felt his breath catch.  _How in the name of the maker did you turn out so lovely?  How did the First Order not kill that?_

 

Finn turned and smiled at Poe.  “It’s gonna be a beautiful day.”

 

“Yes, it is,” Poe said. 

 

They stared at each other, both smiling, both lost in their thoughts.

 

A gust of wind rocked the balloon.  Finn grabbed the basket.

 

Poe closed his eyes.  _You’re just a mission to him.  Stop ogling the kid._   He walked across the basket, stretched and then slid down in Finn’s old spot.

 

“When do you want me to wake you?”

 

“Give me a few hours,” Poe said, closing his eyes.  “And wake me if you see anything.”

 

“Don’t worry,” Finn said, scanning the early morning skies.  “I will.”

 

**# # # #**

 

_Poe snores_ , Finn thought to himself a few hours later.  He smiled and watched the inventor.  Poe’s arms were crossed over his chest and he wore a tiny frown.  His eyes were fluttering a bit.

 

Finn bit the inside of his cheek.  He’d heard stories about Dameron, of course, and he’d spent the better part of the last week spying on him, but that hadn’t prepared him for…  _It’s stupid_ , he assured himself.  _From what Jess tells me, everyone was a bit in love with him when he was with us_.  Finn turned back towards the cloudless sky.  _It’s stupid, Finn_. 

 

He couldn’t help his smile.  _Finn._

 

It started as a strange whirring noise that Finn couldn’t quite place.  He scanned the sky and everything looked clear, but the noise—just low enough almost to be his imagination but not quite—that noise made every hair on his body stand on end. 

 

He ran over and crouched down.  For some reason, he whispered.  “Poe.  Poe!  I need you to wake up.  Now.”

 

Poe’s eyes opened.  It was like he already knew something was wrong.  He opened his mouth to speak and Finn shook his head, pointing his finger up and waiting for the…

 

The whirring noise came again.

 

Poe was up in an instant. 

 

“TIEs,” he hissed.

 

“Frag,” Finn whispered.  “Where?”

 

Poe stood and listened, turning slowly.  He then pointed to the southeast.  “My guess is about three or four of them.  They’re using reflectors to hide in the sunlight.  We’ll see them soon enough.”  He went to the control panel and began pushing buttons.  “Kriffing hell!  I knew this was too easy.”

 

Finn moved towards the gunner’s array.  “Poe, what do I need to do here?” 

 

The gunner’s array was actually a small turret placed below the basket proper.  It was encircled in glass windows, giving the gunner a nearly 360-degree view.  Finn opened the hatch, closed his eyes, and said a quick prayer before climbing down.   _I can do this._

 

Poe pushed one last button and ran over.  He laid flat on the floor of the basket and poked his head down into the gunner’s array.  He started pointing to the controls.  “The guns are on the bottom of the basket, so you’ll have to figure out how to compensate for the slight difference in what you’re seeing versus where they’re aiming.  After your first few shots, you should get a sense of it.”

 

Finn nodded.

 

“This,” Poe said, pointing to something that looked like the handlebars on a pennyfarthing, “is how you aim.”  He pointed to small switches on either side of the handlebar.  “These load your ammunition, and these,” he motioned to buttons lining the handles, “shoot.”  He quickly pointed to the buttons.  “Largest are regular bullets.  These middle ones are what we call howlers.  Think of them as miniature rockets; they have a good blast capability but are a bit less reliable in terms of their flight path.  Finally, these smallest buttons are for something of my own invention.  Think of them as small-scale cannonballs.  They’re best when you’re going for the actual balloon as opposed to the basket.”

 

The whining from the TIEs grew louder.

 

“The whole contraption turns.  It’s on a rotating platform, so just lean—or if you’re really pressed, turn this wheel,” he said pointing behind Finn.  “You should be able to see them anywhere but above us.”

 

Finn nodded.

 

“And this,” Poe said, pointing to a long lever to Finn’s right, “is to drop an actual bomb, so you won’t be touching it.  Well, unless things go really, really wrong.”  He flashed Finn a smile.  “Got it?”

 

“Sure,” Finn said, not sounding in the least like he was. 

 

“Good,” Poe said.  “You’ll be great.”  He pointed to a pair of headphones.  “Communication,” he said, already jogging back over to the controls. 

 

Finn slipped on the headphones and found a strange device hanging off them that he realized fit over his mouth.  He then heard Poe’s voice: “You’re gonna want to strap yourself in.  I tend to fly a bit wild.”

 

“So I’ve been told,” Finn yelled into the device, grabbing the leather straps meant to keep him in place and buckling them around himself.

 

Poe laughed.  “Okay, they’re coming in from the south.  You see them?”

 

“Yeah,” Finn yelled.

 

“Good.  I’m gonna line us up, give you a clean shot.”

 

The balloon sped up as it swooped to the left and Finn was pretty sure he was going to be sick. 

 

_I can do this._

 

He reached for the controls and started turning himself into position.

 

_I can do this._

 

“Okay, we’ve got four of them.  One’s gonna be coming in directly.  It’s gonna be a clear shot in three…two…one…”

 

_I can do this._

 

Finn began firing and watched as the TIE lurched to the left.  He pushed the medium-sized button and watched as a strange object spun in a spiral towards it.  “Come on.  Come on.”

 

Suddenly, the TIE exploded. 

 

“YEAH,” Finn screamed.  “Did you see that?”

 

Poe was laughing.  “Yeah, I saw it.”

 

Their balloon was already banking and then sinking so fast Finn felt like he was floating.  Poe’s voice rang out, “Two more from the west.  And the other one’s trying to hide in the sun.”

 

The balloon lurched again.  _Kriffing hell, Poe!_ Finn gripped the controls a bit more tightly.

 

Finn spotted the two TIEs on the west side and started shooting.  One of them dove while the other tried to turn, but Finn sent another of the howlers at it and hollered as he watched it take out the TIE.  “YES!”  He began laughing.  “That’s how you do it!”

 

“Good shot!”

 

The balloon started rising and they were taking fire.  Finn could hear bullets hitting the sides of the basket and he instinctively tried to duck before realizing he couldn’t really move. 

 

_I can do this._

 

He swung the turret towards the fire and began screaming as he shot at an oncoming TIE.  This one was tricky.  It kept darting away.  “Kriffing hell,” he yelled.  It seemed to jump across the sky.  “Stop moving,” he yelled at it.

 

“One minute,” Poe called out and then, they were diving and Finn was shouting.

 

“What are you doing, Dameron?!?!?”

 

“Be ready,” Poe barked.  “In three…two…one…”

 

The TIE was right in Finn’s sights.  He fired and watched the balloon start to deflate.  “Woo-hoo,” he hooted.  “That was amazing, Poe!”

 

Poe laughed but then cursed.  “Kriffing sithspit!” 

 

The balloon banked and Finn fell into the glass barrier.  He jerked back and began turning but he couldn’t see anything.  “Where is it?”  He kept turning.  There was nothing.

 

“Trying to stay up top…” Poe yelled.  Finn could hear the other man grunting and pulling levers.  “Give me a second.”

 

The balloon swerved to the right and was going up, up, up.  Finn grabbed the controls, trying not to tremble.  He was breathing in short gasps.  He kept turning but he couldn’t see anything.  “Come on, Poe,” he muttered.  “Come on.”

 

Then, the other TIE came into sight. 

 

“I’ve got it,” Finn screamed, firing everything he had. 

 

“Dammit,” he yelled.  The TIE was weaving madly, managing to avoid everything he was sending at it.  “Get us higher,” he said.

 

Finn held his breath, his finger over the smallest button.  “Come on.  Come on.  Just a bit higher.”  He knew he only had one chance to get this right.  The TIE came into view.

 

Finn took a breath and pressed the button.

 

Two seconds later, the balloon exploded.

 

“YES,” Poe screamed.  “Kriffing yes!”

 

Finn let out the breath and leaned back.  _YES!_   He took a deep breath and listened.  It was quiet.  “That all of them?”  He looked around, spinning in the turret.

 

After a minute, Poe said, “Yeah, I think so.”

 

“Good.  Get me out of this thing.”

 

“Will do,” Poe said.

 

Poe appeared at the hatch a moment later.  He smiled down at Finn.  “That was amazing!”

 

Finn smiled up at him.  “I know!”  He laughed.  “And you!  You’re…you’re incredible!  I’ve never seen anyone fly like that before.”

 

Poe reached down to help Finn up.  He was blushing.  “Thanks.”  He bit his lip.  “You’re a good man, Finn.”

 

Finn pushed himself out of the turret, landing next to Poe on the floor of the basket.  “You too, Poe.”  He couldn’t help his big, dumb grin as he stared at Poe, who just sat there, smiling and shaking his head. 

 

Poe pulled Finn into a hug.  “We made it!”

 

“Incredible,” Finn mumbled, feeling his face flush.  “Incredible.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They spent the rest of the day and that night on lookout.  Poe slept while Finn kept watch and Finn dozed while Poe kept an eye on the skies, but there were no further problems.  Yet, as they crossed the Channel, Poe’s anxiety was palpable.  “How long since you’ve been back,” Finn asked, digging through a small crate of rations.  He handed a canteen to Poe.

 

“How long since I left the Resistance,” Poe asked, taking a drink.

 

_You don’t know?_   “Five years,” Finn said, shaking his head.  “And you haven’t missed it?”

 

Poe looked down over the side of the basket at the English countryside.  “It’s not a matter of missing it.  It’s what was best for me…and for everyone else.”

 

Finn snorted.

 

Poe said, “For someone who met me two days ago, you seem to have very strong opinions about how I should live my life.”

 

“I just don’t appreciate lies.”

 

Poe wanted to get mad, but he heard himself laugh.  “Finn, I think in another lifetime, you and I would have been the best of friends.”

 

“And in this one?”

 

Poe’s first thought was of what it would feel like to kiss Finn.  He flushed and began stammering, “Shouldn’t be too much longer to the estate.”

 

“Good,” Finn said.  “Plenty of people who’ll be happy that you’re back.”

 

“I’m not back,” Poe said.

 

“Ummmmm-hmmmm,” Finn hummed.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In our next chapter: reunions, a very tense dinner, and a moment on a staircase.


	3. He's Not Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe returns to the Organa estate. It's a tense reunion.

 

 

They landed in a grassy patch behind the main house.  Poe began throwing tether lines to four men stationed below them.  None of the men looked familiar.  _Maybe that’s a good thing_ , Poe thought.

 

As the men secured the balloon, Poe turned to Finn.  “Are you ready?”

 

“As ever,” Finn said.

 

Poe sighed to himself as he started down the ramp, taking in the vast Organa estate.  He remembered the space well.  He looked off to the west to the stables and the hangar where the Resistance’s balloons were repaired and stored.  Off to the east was a wooded area that housed a hidden complex for training new recruits.  And directly in front of them was the back of the main house.

 

Poe found his feet getting heavier and heavier as they moved forward.  Finn walked a few paces in front of him before turning back.  He leaned in. “It will be fine,” he whispered.  He took Poe’s arm and began leading him towards the house. 

 

There was a large group of people having tea on the lawn to their right.  Poe’s eyes flickered over them and he recognized a few faces, but suddenly he felt his panic rising.  He stopped.  “I can’t…Finn, I can’t do this.”

 

Finn leaned in again.  “Poe, you can do this.”  He gripped Poe’s arm more forcefully.  “Just keep your eyes on the door.  You can do this.”

 

_Eyes on the door.  Eyes on the door._

 

“Oh my goodness!  Is that?”  A small woman with straight black hair started laughing and then jumped up from the table, her skirts swishing as she ran towards Poe and Finn.  “Poe Dameron!”  She jumped up on him and enveloped him in a hug.

 

Poe staggered back with a loud _Ooomph_.  “Hello, Jess.”

 

“Poe,” she said, squeezing.  “You’re back!”

 

“No.  I’m just here to help.  Temporarily.”

 

She let go of him and stepped back, raising an eyebrow.  “Temporarily?”

 

Before Poe could respond, a smiling man with large black eyes jogged over and slapped him on the back.  “Poe,” said Iolo.

 

“Iolo!”  Poe turned and held out his hand.  “Good to see you.”

 

“So, you’re back,” Iolo said, shaking it.

 

“No,” Poe said.

 

And before Iolo could ask his follow-up question, a large bearded man came up to the group.  “Poe Dameron, how are you?”

 

“Snap?” Poe laughed.  “I’m doing well.  How are you?”

 

“Good!  I’m glad you’re back.”

 

“I’m not back.”

 

Snap looked to Jess and Iolo.  “That’s what he says,” Jess said.

 

“Look, everyone,” Poe started.

 

“Poe,” a tall, dark-skinned woman said, walking towards him.

 

“Karé!”

 

She hugged him.  “We’ve missed you, you idiot!”  She cuffed him on the arm.

 

Poe chuckled.  “I’ve missed you too.”

 

“So, you’re back?”

 

Poe groaned, but before he could respond, Finn, Iolo, Snap, and Jess all said, “He’s not back.”

 

Karé looked over the group and rolled her eyes.  “I’m glad you’re back,” she said, squeezing Poe’s shoulder. 

 

Poe opened his mouth to argue and then thought better of it.  He gave a loud whistle and BB-8 rolled down the ramp.  As she zoomed over, the entire group watched her, spellbound.  “Everyone, this is Beebee-Ate.  Bee, this is everyone.”

 

BB-8 let out a series of clicks and dings before turning in a circle and then stopping with a flourish.

 

Karé laughed.  “Come on, the General will want to see you.”  She looked down at BB-8.  “Both of you.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Karé left Poe, Finn, and BB-8 in the library. 

 

Poe kneeled.  “Bee, I’m going to switch you off for a few minutes.”

 

She made a clearly distressed noise at that.

 

“It’s only to check that I didn’t do anything stupid when we were leaving the workshop.  I had to put you back together rather quickly, Bee.”  He waited for a moment and added, “Please?”

 

Finn could swear that Bee then huffed out the automaton’s equivalent of “Fine.”  He covered his mouth to keep from laughing too loudly.

 

Poe switched Bee off and lifted her onto a nearby table with a groan.  He reached for the tool belt strapped to his thigh.  His fingers moved over one and then another and then another of the tools.  After a moment, he looked up at the ceiling.  “Of course, I don’t have what I need.”

 

“Maybe I can be of help,” said a voice from the doorway.

 

Poe turned to spy a pretty young woman with her brown hair piled in a series of buns standing there holding a large toolbox.  “Karé said you might want this.”

 

Poe nodded and indicated the table next to Bee.

 

The girl put the toolbox down and then immediately leaned in, her eyes were as big as saucers.  “It’s a Beebee unit.”

 

“Modified,” Poe added.

 

She smiled as she began circling the automaton.  “This is amazing.”

 

Finn couldn’t help but laugh at the way Poe beamed at that.  “Poe Dameron, this is Rey Kenobi.  Rey, this is Poe.”

 

If it was possible, Rey’s eyes grew even wider.  “You’re THE Poe Dameron?  I’ve been wanting to talk to you for ages and…”  She looked at Finn, who was trying to hold back yet another laugh.  She tried to settle into her genteel _lady of breeding_ persona.  “It’s good to meet you, Mr. Dameron.”  She held out her hand and curtseyed.

 

“Good to meet you too, Miss Kenobi,” Poe said, clearly amused.  He took her hand and bent over, kissing it.

 

Finn rolled his eyes.  “Oh please,” he muttered.

 

Poe winked at him.

 

Finn nodded towards Rey.  “She’s also an inventor.”

 

“Really?”

 

“And a Balloonist.  Best we’ve got.”

 

Finn didn’t miss Poe’s jaw tighten slightly.  “Oh?”

 

“I’m sure I’m nowhere near as good as you,” Rey stammered.

 

Poe forced a smile as he opened the toolbox and picked up a large wrench.  “I’m sure you’re wonderful.  I haven’t flown an X-wing in years.”

 

“I’d love to see you fly some time,” Rey said.

 

Poe nodded.  “We’ll see.”  He moved back towards BB-8.  “Where is Leia anyway?”

 

“I’m right here, Poe,” the General said.  Poe startled and dropped his wrench. 

 

“Blast, Leia.  What if I’d been working?”

 

“It’s good to see you too, Poe.”

 

Poe turned.  He hadn’t known what to expect, but Leia was the same: small but radiating power.  There was a kindness in her eyes, but he’d long since given up trusting it.  Her dress was a severe shade of grey, and even though it looked just as delicate and demur as something he might find on any other woman, he knew there were at least six weapons hidden in the corset alone. 

 

She floated in and offered him her hand.  He took it, bending down to kiss it.  “Leia,” he murmured against her glove.

 

“Poe.”  She said, sizing up BB-8.  “So, this is what you’ve been up to?”

 

“Among other things,” Poe said.  “How have you been?”

 

Leia raised an eyebrow at that.  “Is that how we’re going to do this?”

 

Poe smirked.  “Or we could just start arguing?”

 

Finn huffed out a breath and stared at the ceiling.  “You’re just determined to be obstinate, aren’t you?”

 

Leia put a hand on Finn’s arm.  “Poe doesn’t mean anything by it.  Trust me.  I know.”  With that last comment, she fixed her eyes directly on Poe’s.  Gone was the kindness from earlier.  This was a warning.

 

“That doesn’t work on me anymore, Leia.”

 

She raised an eyebrow.

 

 _Okay, maybe a little, but I’m not going to tell you that._   Poe crossed his arms and leaned against the table.  “You’re the one who sent for me.”

 

“That we did, Commander Dameron.”

 

“That’s not who I am anymo—”

 

“As I was saying, _Commander Dameron_ ,” Leia said, motioning to a set of chairs on the other side of the room.  “We have reports that Ben is building a device for the First Order.  We don’t know much about it, but our informants are scared—and even some of our other…rivals have been leaving England and the continent for safer spaces.”

 

“Why call me?  You have plenty of people here who are good tinkerers and inventors.”  He nodded at Rey.

 

Leia smiled at the girl before turning back to Poe.  “You and Ben were friends.  If there is anyone alive besides me who knows how his brain works, it’s you.”

 

“What about Han?”

 

Leia bristled at that.  “Lord Solo is in the colonies currently.  We’ve sent word, but we don’t expect him back in time.”

 

“And your brother?”

 

“Still missing.”

 

Poe leaned back into his chair.  He fixed his eyes on Leia for a good minute.  “But that’s not the only reason you asked me to come.”

 

“It isn’t,” Leia said, feigning ignorance.

 

“Leia, do you really want to have that argument again?”

 

“Commander Dameron, do you really want me to remind you that we’re in the middle of a war, and I will do whatever is necessary to see that these evil-doers are destroyed?”

 

Finn could see the tension rising.  “Perhaps we could focus on the task at hand and save this…discussion for a later date?”

 

Poe’s gaze hadn’t left Leia’s.  “Fine,” he said.

 

“Of course,” Leia said.

 

“But as long as we’re clear that the real reason you wanted me here is Bee.”

 

“And why do you think that?”

 

“Because Finn—”

 

“Finn,” Rey asked.

 

“Oh, right.  Ummmm, that’s me now, I guess,” Finn said.  He couldn’t help his smile as he said, “Finn.”

 

“Finn,” Rey repeated.  “I like it.”

 

“It suits you,” Leia said.  She then turned to Poe.  “You were saying?”

 

Poe let out a breath.  “As I was saying, Finn let it slip, and I’m more than aware of what my work  will mean for this war of yours.”

 

Finn looked shocked.  “Poe, I…”

 

Poe turned to Finn.  “My guess is she told you that I was working on something that could help, but didn’t provide any details.”  He turned back to Leia.  “Because I’m guessing you didn’t have any details.”

 

“We heard rumors, but no one knew where you were for sure.”

 

Poe nodded.  “Which is why the Order didn’t kill me or kidnap me a long time ago.”

 

“So what is it you have there exactly?”

 

Poe looked over his shoulder at BB-8.  “That’s Bee.  Beebee-Ate.  She’s as close to a fully self-aware automaton as you’re going to get.  She can make decisions in the field.  She’s also fully equipped as a miniature spy.  She has the ability to make photographs as well as limited ability at recording moving pictures.  In short, you can tell her to go into a space and she can recon it for you, making decisions about where to go and when to hide, without the need for an external operator.”

 

Leia smiled, leaning back and tenting her fingers in front of her face.  “Do you think you’d be able to provide us with schematics to produce our own versions of BB-8?”

 

Poe laughed ruefully.  “They’re in a crate in my balloon.”

 

“So you knew…” Finn started.

 

“Of course,” Poe said, leaning back into his chair.  “She doesn’t need _me_.  She needs Bee.”

 

“Poe, I’m sure…” Finn started.

 

Poe stood and said to Leia, “You want to deny it?”

 

She said nothing.

 

Poe looked to Rey and Finn.  “Is dinner still at seven?  I’ll need to unpack my things and change.”

 

They nodded.

 

Leia said, “I’ve put you in the first room on the right just at the top of the stairs.”

 

Poe gave a quick bow and left.

 

Finn stayed in his seat, trying to process what had just happened.

 

Leia stood.  “Finn, Rey,” she said.  “I’ve had a wire from Maz, and I was hoping that in the morning you would be willing to fly over to Takodana Manor to find out what she wants.”

 

“Of course,” Finn said mechanically.

 

“Yes,” Rey said.

 

Leia started to leave the room.  At the door, she paused.  “He needs someone to hate as much as he hates himself.  I couldn’t let anyone else do it.  But he is wrong, Finn.  I very much do want him here.  He belongs here; he’s just forgotten that.  Plus, he’ll be able to piece together what Ben’s doing far better than the rest of us.  I’m sure of it.”

 

“Ma’am,” Finn said.  “What happened?”

 

“With Poe?”

 

He nodded.

 

She considered the question for a moment before saying, “He lost so many things in quick succession.  And then he lost his faith.”  She shook her head as she closed the door.

 

Rey looked over at Finn.  “That was…,” she started.

 

“Unpleasant,” Finn finished.

 

**# # # #**

 

Dinner at the Organa Estate was usually a lively affair.  The top officers and officials of the Resistance meeting over an elegant meal to discuss their plans for the coming day and any new intel they might have received.

 

This evening, though, dinner was subdued.

 

While there were many around the table who were more than pleased that Poe was back, the tension between Poe and Leia was palpable.

 

Finn stared at Rey, seated across from him, and made his eyes wide.  _Say something.  Anything!_

 

Rey frowned down at her plate before turning to Poe, seated to her left.  “How did you find Italy?”

 

Finn rolled his eyes and Rey kicked him under the table.  _You don’t like my questions, ask your own!_

 

“Italy was…pleasant,” Poe said.  “Quiet.”

 

“Has the Order’s influence reached there as well,” asked Major Ematt.

 

Poe nodded.  “It’s not as well organized as it is here, but…”  He stabbed at his green beans.  “They’ve spread all over the continent at this point.”

 

“That is why we need to be setting up branches in all the major capitals,” Admiral Akbar said.  “We can’t be responsive to situations that are two days away by balloon.”

 

Soon, the far end of the table was embroiled in a loud debate over the merits of splitting their forces.

 

Rey turned to Poe and said quietly, “They’re always like that.”

 

Poe watched the other end of the table.  Leia was sitting silently listening to the debate rage.  He smiled and nodded.  “I remember.”

 

Finn asked, “Well, what do you think?”

 

“About?”

 

“What the Admiral said.”

 

“I think those sorts of questions don’t concern me anymore,” Poe said, making a show of refocusing on his food.  He glanced over at Finn.  _Why is he still wearing his gloves?_

 

“So if the First Order takes over, you’re fine with that?”

 

“Finn,” Rey said, her voice full of warning.

 

Poe smiled at her.  “No, it’s okay.”  He turned to Finn.  “No, I’m not _fine_ with the First Order.  But no, I’m not coming back to the Resistance either.”

 

“Okay, but are those the only two options,” Finn challenged.  “Do everything or do nothing at all?”

 

“Who says I’ve been doing nothing, Finn?”

 

“Boys,” Rey said.  “Play nice!”

 

Finn smiled.  “We’re just having a healthy discussion, Rey.”

 

“Sure,” Poe said, “a healthy discussion.”  He turned to Finn.  “Why do you care so much about what I do?”

 

“I just don’t understand the choice to turn your back on—”

 

“I didn’t turn my back on anything!”

 

Suddenly both Finn and Poe realized that everyone else at the table had gone quiet.

 

Leia cleared her throat.  “I think you can clear the plates, Threepio,” she said to her butler.  Servants began scurrying around the table.  “And maybe while we wait for the final course, you can tell us what you think Ben might be up to, Poe.”

 

Poe leaned back in his chair.  “I don’t know for sure.”

 

“Guess,” Leia said.

 

Poe flashed on a memory—it was years ago; they were both still kids.  He and Ben were playing in Luke’s workshop, laughing and gushing about all the things they were going to build when they got older.  Ben’s eyes had gotten big and he’d started talking about his dream…

 

Poe’s eyes had gone glassy—he was staring off into the distance, lost in his memories. 

 

Leia cleared her throat.  “Poe?”

 

He startled and stared at her, frowning.  When he finally did speak, his voice was gravelly.  “He always had an interest in rocketry.” He took a long drink.  “My guess is he is trying to make something programmable.”

 

“But we already have that,” Admiral Statura interrupted.

 

“Yes, but something far more accurate that what we have now.  Right now, our rockets tend to have very little firepower.  He’s definitely improved upon that.  But I’m guessing he’s also working out how to build something that can fly long distances reliably.  Precision targeting at long ranges with heavy payloads.  Perhaps even manned flight.”  Poe chuckled.  “He always wanted to fly to the stars.”

 

His eyes met Leia’s.  Her eyes were sad.  “Yes, he did,” she said in a small voice.  She took a breath and refocused.  “So you think rockets?”

 

“I’m almost certain of it,” Poe said.  “I can’t tell you what his other inventors are working on, but if Ben’s developing something, it is something that will fly.”

 

“If that’s the case,” Finn said.  “Then what help is BB-8 going to be?”

 

Leia looked to Poe, who answered, “If you can find a possible workshop or a factory, we can send her in to do recon.  Lower the risks to our organic operatives.”

 

Finn bristled a bit at that.

 

The servants brought in the next course.  Leia said, “So, now I want to hear theories on where the Order is developing these rockets.” 

 

The table erupted into discussion.

 

**# # # #**

 

As soon as he could politely take his leave, Poe sprinted from the dining room towards the stairs.  Finn jogged to catch him.

 

“Poe,” Finn said, taking the other man’s arm as he started up the stairs.  “I just wanted to say that I didn’t mean anything earlier.”

 

Poe smiled down at Finn.  “It’s okay.  I was young and idealistic once too.”

 

Finn frowned.  “Don’t do that.”

 

“What?”

 

“Patronize me,” Finn said.

 

Poe closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Finn,” he started.

 

“No, I get it.  You’re the grizzled, old veteran,” Finn said, being sure to emphasize the word _old._ “But that doesn’t mean I don’t know a thing or two.”

 

“I’m not saying you don’t.  I’m just saying that not everything is black or white.  There’s a lot of grey area to consider.”

 

Finn shook his head.  “Grey area?  When the Order is slaughtering people?  When they’re stealing children off the street to force them into their sweatshops or worse yet, their training programs?”

 

Poe’s face went ashen.  “Finn, is that…”

 

Finn shook his head.  “It’s in the past.”  He absolutely hated the look of concern that Poe was giving him.  He cleared his throat.  “What I’m saying is, I don’t think there are grey areas when the Order is doing those sorts of things.  You used to think the same thing.”

 

“Maybe,” Poe said.

 

“Maybe?”

 

“Finn, there’s a lot more to this than the Order is evil and the Resistance is good.  Or did you never stop to think about all the ways in which—”

 

“No,” Finn said, rather forcefully.  “You aren’t really going to try to tell me that because we have some flawed leaders, we’re just as bad as the—”

 

“Stars, no, Finn!  What I’m saying is, that…”  Poe shook his head in frustration.  He gripped the bannister.  His voice was barely above a whisper as he spoke.  “I used to think I knew what I was fighting for, and back then I didn’t care when she’d give an order I didn’t feel completely comfortable with or when I would to send my Balloonists into fights I wasn’t sure they should be in, but then…”  His fingers dug into the wood.  “But then, I watched good people turn bad.  And…and even better people die for no good reason and…”  He turned and looked at Finn.  “I…I designed…”  He closed his eyes trying to stop the tears from forming.  “I…”  He shook his head again.  “It’s one thing when it’s the enemy, Finn.  It’s another when it’s your…”  He licked his lips.

 

Finn put his hand on Poe’s shoulder, fighting the urge to pull the older man into a hug.

 

Eventually Poe spoke, his voice a tad shaky, “Fervent, mindless dedication to a cause, no matter how noble, is a bad idea.  You need people to question, to disagree, to…”

 

“That’s why we need people like you,” Finn said, squeezing Poe’s shoulder.

 

Poe turned to him, a tiny smile on his face.  “You just don’t give up, do you, buddy?”

 

Finn shook his head.  “Nope.”

 

The two men stood there staring at each other in the quiet of the staircase.  The rest of the house was in the library, arguing strategy, but here, the whole world was just Poe and Finn.

 

Poe’s eyes still had tears in them.  Finn couldn’t help but notice how it made them sparkle in the half light.  Without thinking, he reached up and brushed a gloved finger across Poe’s cheek, wiping away a stray tear.  Poe’s breath caught and Finn remembered himself. 

 

He jerked away from Poe, nearly stumbling down the stairs.  “Sorry,” he said.

 

Poe reached out to help steady him, seeming to come out of his trance.  “Oh yeah, no worries, buddy.”  He left his hand on Finn’s arm for a beat too long before yanking his hand back.  “Uhhhhhh….”

 

Finn looked at his feet, hoping Poe couldn’t make out how flushed he felt.  “Ummmmm….”

 

Poe recovered first.  “So, um, want to show me around tomorrow morning?  I’m sure things have changed since I left.”

 

Finn looked up at Poe, smiling.  “I’m sure they have.”  _Stop flirting, Finn_.  “Oh, but um, Rey and I are flying over to Takodana Manor tomorrow morning.” 

 

Poe felt something heavy coil in his chest at the mention of Rey.  _You can’t be jealous of that lovely girl, Dameron_.

 

Finn shrugged.  “Maybe you could get Jess or Karé to…”

 

Poe shook his head and forced his voice to sound light.  “No worries, Finn.  I’m sure I’ll figure things out.”  He took a step back up the staircase.  “Not like I’m going to be here that long anyway, right?”

 

“Right,” Finn repeated, clearly disappointed.

 

“So, um, goodnight, Finn,” Poe said as he started back up the stairs.

 

“Night, Poe,” Finn said, watching until Poe disappeared into his room at the top of the stairs.

 

“Fragging hell,” Finn breathed out as he started back down.  “Fragging, kriffing hell.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: what happened five years ago that forced Poe to leave the Resistance?


	4. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe tries to deal with the past.
> 
> There's an attack on Takodana Manor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I should offer up a tw: realistic depiction of removing an arrow from someone's shoulder (no, you don't just pull it out).

 

 

Poe fell against the door as he shut it.  _What in the kriffing hell was that, Dameron?!?!?!_   He closed his eyes, trying to steady his breathing.  _You aren’t staying.  There is no future here._

_There’s no future with him._

 

He pushed off the door, pulling at his cravat and unbuckling his jacket.  _And you have no fragging right to be jealous._

Poe paused, remembering the brush of Finn’s hand across his cheek, the look in Finn’s eyes.  Even now, Poe knew that if he’d just leaned in, snaked his hand around Finn’s neck and pulled him in…  _STOP IT NOW, DAMERON!_

 

Poe threw himself with a huff onto his bed, tugging at his boots.  _Just go to sleep.  Just go to sleep and do what you came here to do._

 

Poe fell back onto the bed with a sigh.  Thoughts of Finn’s eyes and that smile already filling his head.

 

**# # # #**

 

Muran smiled that sly smile of his as he hopped into the prototype balloon.  “See you on the other side, Commander.”  He winked at Poe.

 

_No!  No, Muran!  Get out of there.  Don’t go._

_Don’t go!  You’ll be—_

 

Poe was trying to run towards him, trying to find his voice to scream, but Muran was already cutting the tethers and lifting off.

 

“No,” Poe managed weakly.  _Don’t leave me here_.

 

Poe’s feet were rooted to the ground.  He tried to move and only succeeded in sinking further.  He looked around desperately as other Resistance members ambled around the lawn.  No one seemed to notice him.  _Somebody help me_ , he tried to scream, but nothing would come out.  _Please!  Someone!_

 

He saw Leia and began clawing at the ground.  She marched right up to him and squatted down—his head and shoulders now the only things above the surface.  He tried to reach out to her, his fingers desperately digging into the dirt.

 

“I’m so sorry, Poe,” she said.  “You did everything you could.”

 

_That’s not true_ , he tried to say, as he slipped lower and lower.  _We sent him to his death.  He shouldn’t have been out there.  I shouldn’t have let him go._

 

His head was now slipping past the surface.  His fingers clawed at the dirt but he kept falling and falling. 

 

Leia was now nothing more than a bright image at the far end of a dark, dark tunnel.

 

Dirt was raining down on him.  _I can’t breathe._

_I can’t breathe._

_Muran!_

 

“Muran,” Poe screamed, sitting up in bed. 

 

He was panting, covered in sweat.  He forced himself to take first one, then two deep breaths.  _It was a dream_ , he reminded himself _.  Just a dream_.

 

Poe swallowed and the memories came flooding back…

 

 

It was five years ago.  Poe had just designed a new prototype X-wing, even faster than its predecessors, and Muran— _reckless, wonderful Muran_ —offered to test it while they were stationed in France.  Poe wanted to wait until they were back in England, but Leia agreed with Muran over Poe’s objections. 

 

It was just dumb luck, really.  There was a surprise attack by an anti-Royalist group, and suddenly Poe was scrambling to get balloons into the air. 

 

He remembered yelling at Muran to land; Muran ignored him, twisting and turning his way through the fight.

 

_He was always a flashy pilot_ , Poe thought.  _We really did fit each other_.  A tear fell down Poe’s cheek.  He closed his eyes, hearing Muran scream and that last sickening whine of bullets before the explosion.

 

Poe remembered the looks from everyone after the memorial.  No one knew what to say.

 

Then, the meeting a month later: Leia ordering her engineers to build another version of the prototype.

 

“You can’t,” Poe yelled.

 

“I have to,” Leia responded, as cool as ever.

 

“He died, Leia.  Muran died.”

 

“Not because of the balloon.”

 

“Of course, it was because of the balloon,” Poe said, banging his fists on the table in front of them.  “Muran was one of our best pilots! _I_ got him killed, and I will not have anyone else’s blood on my hands!”

 

“Poe,” Leia started, putting her hand on his arm.

 

Poe jerked out of her grasp.  “No.”  He stepped back.  “If you build that prototype, you build it without me.”

 

“Poe?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “I can’t do this anymore.”  He walked out of the room…

 

 

Poe swallowed hard, forcing himself out of the memories.  He looked around the dark room.  The clock on the mantle said 3:00 am. 

 

He fell back onto the bed with a sigh.  _Just sleep_ , _Dameron,_ he told himself.  _Just sleep and get this over with and go back to Italy._

 

**# # # #**

 

Alarms were blaring throughout the house.

 

Poe jumped out of bed, running towards his closet and pulling out his clothes.  He didn’t even think; he simply dressed and then ran downstairs into the command center.

 

He saw Snap and grabbed the other man’s arm.  “What’s…”

 

“Attack on Takodana Manor,” Snap said, pulling out of Poe’s grasp and walking towards the door.  “The Order has a whole fleet there, it sounds like.”

 

Poe ran towards the front of the room where Leia was barking out orders.

 

“Let me go,” Poe said.

 

Leia lifted an eyebrow. “I thought you weren’t back,” she said.

 

“Leia,” Poe barked.  “We can play games later.  Right now, you need everyone you can get in the air.  An attack on Takodana is unprecedented.  You know what it means.”

 

Leia’s mouth was set in a tight line.  “Fine.”  She turned around and yelled, “Jess!  Get this idiot a balloon!”

 

Jess ran up, her skirts swishing around her feet.  She smiled and grabbed Poe’s arm.  “Come on, flyboy.  I think I’ve got something you’ll like.”

 

A minute later Poe stopped dead in his tracks as Jess pointed to a balloon.  “Black One,” he whispered.

 

“We’ve kept her up and running for you.”

 

“How did you know that I’d be…”

 

“We hoped, Poe.”  Jess started tugging on his arm.  “Come on.  We need to be in the air already!”

 

Jess ran towards her balloon as Poe jumped into Black One’s basket.

 

Small single-operator balloons were almost exclusively for military use.  They flew quick and could go into the kinds of tight spaces that dirigibles and some of the other, bigger balloons couldn’t.  Yet, they were one of the hardest types of balloon to operate.  That’s why the First Order had pretty much abandoned them in favor of the two-person TIEs.  _Still_ , Poe reflected as the propellers engaged and Black One started rising over the Organa Estate, _there’s nothing quite like an X-wing_. 

 

As he got into formation, he slipped on a giant pair of headphones.  The radio reception could get spotty in the clouds, but it was still the only way to stay in communication with the other balloons and the ground.  He flicked a switch and yelled into a box in front of him, “This is Black One.  What’s our ETA?”

 

“About ten minutes,” Snap’s distorted voice answered.  “Good to have you back, Poe.”

 

“I’m not back,” Poe said with a smile.

 

Snap laughed.  “Right, I forgot.”

 

**# # # #**

 

As they neared the airspace over Takodana, Poe spied at least fifteen TIEs attacking the main house.  Thankfully, Maz had a good array of anti-balloon defenses, but it was clear that her side was losing.

 

Poe’s first instinct was to start barking orders, but just as he opened his mouth, he remembered, _I’m not their Commander anymore_.  He squeezed his eyes shut and waited to be told what to do.

 

Soon, though, Karé’s garbled voice came over the comms, “Are you going to tell us what to do, Poe, or are you so rusty you don’t remember what to do in a fight?”

 

“I thought,” Poe started.

 

“We’re waiting, Commander,” Jess said.

 

Poe smiled and gripped the controls of his balloon a little tighter.  “Everyone stay low.  Karé, you and Jess go to the east.  Snap, you and Iolo, go west.  Everyone else with me.  Try to draw their fire away from the house.”  He laughed as he pressed forward.

 

“Good to have you back, sir,” Iolo said as they started their attack.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn was a trained Renegade, so the explosions and screaming didn’t bother him, but he did pause as he watched the X-wings descend on the TIEs. 

 

He’d seen plenty of battles in the past two years, but he’d never seen anything like the black and orange balloon currently swooping through the action.  It was doing things that simply couldn’t be possible.

 

_Poe_ , he thought with a smile.  He nudged Rey who was standing next to him, helping to hold off a squadron of Stormtroopers.  “That’s one hell of a pilot!”

 

She nodded.  _Oh, you have it bad_ , she thought with a smile.  “Fight now, appreciate Dameron later.”

 

Finn blushed and refocused on the task at hand.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe let out a whoop as another TIE exploded in his sights.  “Woooo-hoooo,” he crowed.  “I forgot how fun this is,” he yelled.

 

“That’s what happens when you leave for five years,” Karé chided.

 

Jess yelled, “A little help please.”  There was a TIE managing to stay above her giving her problems. 

 

“On it,” Snap yelled.

 

“Poe, there’s one on your six,” Iolo barked.

 

“On it.”  Poe laughed.  _I missed this._

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn leaned in to Rey, “You go help those people over near the house.  I’ve got these troopers.”

 

Rey nodded and sprinted towards a group of Maz’s people pinned down by Stormtroopers.  Just as she got close, though, a tall masked man, dressed all in black, appeared.  He raised some sort of gun at Rey.

 

Finn watched in horror.  He screamed “Rey!” just as the masked man shot a net at her. 

 

Rey was tangled in it and immediately fell.  She began struggling as the masked man strode towards her.

 

Finn ran at the man, screaming.  He began shooting.

 

The man ducked and produced a crossbow, firing it at Finn.

 

An arrow took off, lodging in Finn’s shoulder.  Finn fell to his knees, screaming in agony.

 

The man bent over and put something over Rey’s mouth.  She stopped moving.  The man picked Rey up and began carrying her towards a dirigible tethered on the far side of the property.

 

Finn forced himself up.  His voice was ragged as he yelled, “Rey!  Rey!”  He couldn’t get a clean shot that wouldn’t put her in danger.

 

As the man entered the dirigible, its crew cut the tethers and it began to lift off.

 

Finn kept running, tears streaking down his cheeks. 

 

He stood directly under the basket and whimpered, “Rey?”

 

**# # # #**

 

“They’re leaving,” Karé said.

 

“Karé, you and Snap do one last patrol to make sure they’re gone and then land.  The rest of you land and help assess what the damage is.”

 

Poe brought Black One down in a clearing near the house.  As he was throwing his tether lines to some of Maz’s people, he spotted Finn, sitting on the ground near a pile of rubble nursing what looked to be an injured shoulder.

 

“Finn,” Poe screamed, jumping out of his basket and running across the debris-strewn lawn towards his friend.  Poe came crashing into the ground next to him, already trying to see where Finn was hurt.

 

“Poe,” Finn said.  “Poe, I’m fine.”  He grimaced as he tried to push himself up.

 

Poe frowned at the arrow sticking out of Finn’s shoulder as he got an arm under Finn and began pulling him up.  “Yeah, I can tell.”

 

Finn shot Poe an annoyed glance but let the older man help him up.

 

“What happened,” Poe asked.

 

Finn shook his head.  “Rey and I flew out early this morning to talk to Maz and we’d just sat down to breakfast when twenty TIEs started attacking.  We couldn’t even make it back to the balloon.”  Finn shook his head.

 

A medic ran over and frowned at Finn’s shoulder.  She turned to Poe and said, “Help me get his shirt off.”

 

The two of them began pulling first Finn’s vest and then his undershirt off.  Poe couldn’t help but stare at the other man’s bare chest before noticing that Finn still had his gloves on.  “You ever take those off,” Poe asked.

 

“No,” Finn said flatly while the medic cleaned the area around the wound.

 

“This is going to hurt,” she said, producing a scalpel from her bag and cutting around the wound.

 

Finn yelled.  Poe held him in place, pressing his forehead into the side of Finn’s head and murmuring, “You’re doing great, buddy.”

 

The medic then slid her fingers into the wound, clearly feeling for the arrowhead.

 

Finn’s whole body broke out in sweat.  He was grinding his teeth together to keep from screaming.

 

“So good, buddy,” Poe kept murmuring.  He grabbed Finn’s other hand and squeezed it.

 

“Got it,” the medic whispered, slowing removing the arrowhead and shaft.

 

As soon as it was out, Finn let out a huge breath.

 

“You did it, buddy,” Poe said.

 

The medic quickly worked to clean and bandage the wound.  “You’ll need to see the doctor when we get back to the estate,” she said.  “But it looks clean.”

 

Finn nodded.  “Thanks,” he managed.

 

Snap came running up to them.  “What’s the report, Renegade?”

 

Finn tried to stand at attention, but both the medic and Poe stopped him. 

 

“Renegade, sit down,” Snap barked.

 

“It’s Finn now,” Poe said, a bit defensively.

 

“Of course, it is!”  Snap laughed.  “ _Finn_ , can you tell me what happened?”

 

Finn nodded and began, “Maz is safe.  She’s over there,” he indicated with a nod, “taking care of her people.”  He frowned.  “They got Rey,” he said.

 

For a second, Poe’s blood ran cold.  _If the Order killed that girl, I will—_

 

Finn seemed to sense Poe’s thoughts.  “I mean, they kidnapped her.  Man in a black mask.  Tall.  Same one that shot me.”

 

Poe tensed.  _Surely not…  Please, Ben, tell me you aren’t this far gone._

 

Finn was still talking, “I figure they must know she’s our best pilot and that she’s a tinkerer as well.”

 

Snap nodded.  “I’ll contact Leia, tell her.”

 

As Snap and the medic both left, Poe studied Finn.

 

“What,” Finn asked.

 

“You aren’t worried about her?”

 

Finn rolled his eyes, trying to shrug his shirt and vest back on and wincing in pain.  “A little help,” he asked.

 

Poe started pulling the shirt and vest back on, trying not to notice how his fingers kept brushing against Finn’s skin.  _Not the time, Poe.  He’s wounded._

 

Finn said, “Of course, I’m worried about her.  But I also know that she’s about the smartest person we have working for us, not to mention the toughest.  If anyone can take care of themselves, it’s Rey.  She’ll be okay until we can get to her.”  He stood.  “And mark my words, we’ll get to her.”

 

Poe couldn’t help but smile at the determination in Finn’s voice. 

 

Finn started trying to buckle his vest and groaned in pain.

 

“Let me,” Poe said, quietly, stepping in front of Finn and working his way through the buckles.  He looked up at Finn.  “About last night…I…”  Poe frowned.  “I just wanted to say that I understand your position, I just…I had my reasons for leaving, Finn.”

 

“You were hurt,” Finn said softly.

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  He met Finn’s eyes.  “And I didn’t want anyone else to die needlessly because of me.”

 

“Poe,” Finn said, as Poe finished the final buckle.  “I read the reports.”  Poe started to step away from Finn, but Finn reached out with his good arm, holding Poe in place.  “I read the reports, Poe.  Your design was perfect.  In fact, we’ve been flying with it for years.”  Finn nodded towards the lawn where several X-wings were currently tethered.  “There was nothing anyone could have done to save him,” Finn said.

 

Poe wanted to scream at Finn, tell him he was wrong, but looking into Finn’s eyes—so earnest and kind—Poe felt paralyzed.

 

“You did everything you could, Poe,” Finn whispered.

 

Poe shook his head and looked away.  _I will not let this kid see me cry_.  He tried to pull out of Finn’s grasp on his shoulder, but Finn’s fingers dug in deeper and he pulled Poe forward into a hug.  Finn whispered in his ear, “It wasn’t your fault.”

 

Poe buried his head in Finn’s good shoulder, desperately wanting to believe what this beautiful man was telling him, but not quite buying it.

 

They stayed like that for nearly a minute before a voice cut through the moment like a knife.

 

“Finn,” the raspy voice yelled across the lawn.  “Finn!”

 

Poe pulled back from Finn, furiously wiping his eyes and turning his back on the approaching stranger.

 

“Finn,” the voice said, getting closer.  “Are you well?”

 

“I’m fine, Maz.  Just a scratch.”

 

Poe rolled his eyes at that.

 

Maz said, “I still need to talk to you about…  Dameron, is that you?”

 

Poe turned around and smiled.  “Hi, Maz!”

 

“Poe Dameron!  You come back and you don’t come to say hello to me?”  The tiny, aged woman walked over and swatted his arm.

 

“I just got back yesterday, Maz.”

 

“That’s no excuse,” she said.  “You talk to The Sergeant yet?”

 

“Not yet,” Poe said.

 

She whistled.  “Oh!  Won’t that be a fun conversation?”

 

“Won’t it,” Poe muttered.

 

_The Sergeant?_  Finn looked to Poe, who shook his head and mouthed _later_.

 

“Come on,” she nodded towards a pile of rubble, sitting herself on it.  “You should hear this too, Poe.”

 

“So, what were you going to tell us, Maz,” Finn asked.

 

“One of my operatives sent me this two days ago,” Maz said, handing a telegram to Finn. 

 

He scanned it, frowning.

 

“And,” Poe asked.

 

“Ben is set up in Portsmouth,” Finn said.  “They’ve got a series of warehouses on the wharf there.  The operative doesn’t know what they’re doing, only that the code name for the project is _Starkiller_.”

 

“Portsmouth,” Poe said.  “We could be there in a few hours by balloon.”

 

Finn nodded.  “We’ll have to go back to the estate first.  Make a plan.”

 

“Get you checked out by a doctor,” Poe said.

 

Finn managed a bright smile.  “I’m fine, Commander.  I’ve fought with worse.”

 

Poe started to roll his eyes, but Finn looked so sure of himself.  “Right,” Poe huffed out. 

 

Finn lifted an eyebrow.  _You aren’t going to win this argument, pilot._

 

Poe smiled and opened his mouth to counter, when Maz—who was watching all of the blatant flirting with an amused smile—said, “My guess is that whatever they’re cooking up, the Order is going to be ready to strike within the week.”

 

“So what are we waiting for,” Poe asked, already bowing to Maz and jogging back towards his balloon.

 

Finn smiled, watching him.  “And he says he’s not back.”

 

Maz laughed.  “Dameron always did have trouble staying out of a fight.”  She pushed Finn.  “Now go on or that boy is going to leave you here.”

 

Finn bent over and kissed her cheek.  “Goodbye, Maz.”  He started jogging towards the balloons.  “Hey, Poe!  Wait up!”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: not everyone agrees on the best course of action in going after the First Order, Rey meets Ben Solo, and Poe learns one of Finn's secrets.


	5. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn and Poe are at odds with the Resistance.
> 
> Rey takes advantage of the First Order's sexist policies.
> 
> And Poe learns about Finn's secret.

 

 

The command center was full of people yelling.  Finn leaned against a far wall and closed his eyes.  He tried to ignore the dull throb in his shoulder and the awkward hang of the sling they’d put his arm in.  “This isn’t getting us anywhere,” he muttered.

 

“I’ll say,” Jess agreed.  She nodded towards Poe, who was front and center arguing with Leia.

 

“Just let me go with a small team.  We’ll send BeeBee in,” he motioned towards the automaton who spun and dinged at the mention of her name.  “She’ll recon the facility and then we can make a plan from there.”

 

“Right now, BeeBee is the only one of its kind in existence, Poe.  We can’t risk it—”

 

“Her,” Poe corrected.

 

Leia rolled her eyes.  “We can’t risk _her_ until we have a backup.”

 

“I’m the kriffing backup!  I built her once.  Why wouldn’t I be able to build her again?”

 

“Which would mean I’d need to keep you here.  Safe.  So, are you suggesting sending a team without you to Portsmouth?”

 

“Well, no…”

 

“Then, this discussion is closed.  We can’t risk it.”

 

“But...”

 

“Closed,” Leia said.  “I want to hear other ideas.”

 

The yelling started again.

 

Poe made his way back to Jess and Finn shaking his head.  “Kriffing, short-sighted…”  He looked up at them.  “This is ridiculous!”

 

“She does have a point,” Jess said.

 

“Not you too, Pava,” Poe said, falling against the wall with a sigh.  “Any tinkerer worth their salt could replicate Bee using my blueprints.”  He shook his head.  “She’s just trying to play it safe.”

 

Finn bit his lip.  He really didn’t want to agree with Poe on this one, but he was becoming concerned with everyone else’s lack of urgency in going to get Rey.  He fidgeted for about another minute before stepping forward.  “And what about Rey?”

 

“What about her,” Admiral Statura asked. 

 

“We haven’t discussed mounting a rescue for her yet.”

 

“We can’t risk this entire mission just to get out one person,” a voice from the other side of command said.  There were several voices in agreement.

 

“What,” Finn demanded.  “We’re just going to leave her there?”

 

“Rey is a smart girl, Finn,” the General reminded.  “She’s resourceful.  She’ll figure out a way to get out.”

 

Finn’s rage was palpable.  “With all due respect, ma’am, we can’t just hope that Rey will get lucky.  I know she’s smart and she’s tough, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t going to need help.”

 

“Finn,” Leia said.  “I understand how you feel, but our first priority has to be finding and destroying the Order’s new weapon.”

 

“And Rey?”

 

“We will be able to mount a rescue of her as soon as we’ve neutralized this threat.  But she is one person and the Order could potentially be killing hundreds or even thousands of people,” Leia said, turning back to the rest of command.  “Ideas?”

 

The arguing continued.

 

Finn stomped out of the room.

 

Poe followed him, Jess on his heels.  Poe opened his mouth to say something but Jess shook her head.  “Let him blow off some steam,” she said.

 

“He’s right, you know.”

 

Jess nodded.  “Yeah, but I’m not in charge.”

 

They went back into the command center.  A small boy ran in with a telegram.  The General opened it.  She scanned it and then closed her eyes, shaking her head.

 

“Ben is demanding we surrender Poe’s new device in exchange for Rey.  And he’s giving us twenty-four hours to comply.”

 

The room erupted into a savage debate.  Several people wanted to hand BeeBee over.  Others wanted to attack Ben’s facility now, strike the first blow.

 

Poe stepped back into the debate.  “You can’t be serious about bombing their facility.  With Rey still there?”

 

“We don’t know that she’s there,” said a voice from the other side of the room.

 

“Besides,” said another, “I don’t remember you re-joining the Resistance, Dameron?  What’s any of this to you?”

 

Poe snarled and started forward before Snap and Karé grabbed his arms, and with the help of Jess, drug him from the room.

 

“Stupid, kriffing idiots,” Poe yelled back towards the room.  As soon as they had him in the hall, Poe shook himself free of his friends.  He stomped a few feet into the hall before he stopped at the noise of Bee trailing after him, making a mournful noise.  The automaton stopped and made a series of clicking and dinging sounds before a piece of paper spit out her side.

 

Poe reached down and took the paper, reading [Please don’t give me to the Order.]

 

Poe kneeled in front of Bee.  “Don’t worry, buddy.  I’m not handing you over to them.”  He looked back into the command center.  “Or anyone, for that matter.”  He stood, looking around at his friends—his eyes asking them if they were in or out. 

 

Jess said what the other two were thinking.  “Of course, we’re in.”

 

“Good,” Poe said, “Let’s find Finn.”

 

**# # # #**

 

There was a single lantern glowing on a table at the far end of the hangar.  Jess, Iolo, Snap, Karé, Bastian, Finn, and Poe were gathered around it, staring at a map of Portsmouth.

 

“As best as we can figure, Maz’s informant was talking about a series of warehouses, here,” Snap said pointing to the wharf.  “The problem is, we don’t know which warehouses, and if we try searching them, we risk them seeing us.”

 

“That’s what Bee is for,” Poe said.  “All we need is a secure space somewhere nearby and then we can send Bee in.”

 

The automaton dinged from below the table and Finn could hear a piece of paper being printed.  He kneeled and retrieved it.  He read, [Just point me at those jerks].  Finn laughed.  “Don’t worry, Bee.  That’s what we’re going to do.”

 

Poe raised an eyebrow at Finn.

 

“She’s just ready to get going,” Finn reported.

 

“Okay,” said Karé, “what I would suggest is most of us in our X-wings, ready to strike.  Poe and Bee on the ground—”

 

“I’m going to be on the ground too,” Finn said.  “As soon as we know where Rey is, I’m going in after her.”

 

“Me too,” Bastian said, hobbling forward on a crutch.  “I’m not much good in the air right now, so I’ll run communications between Poe and the rest of you.”

 

Iolo nodded.  “Sounds good, seeing as we don’t have much to go on.”

 

“So,” Snap said, “We wait until the rest of the house has gone to bed and then we take off?”

 

“Sounds like a plan,” Poe said smiling.

 

“It’s good to have you back, Commander,” Jess said.

 

“I’m...,” Poe paused, “I’m not…  Oh just get yourselves ready already,” Poe said, walking towards his TIE.

 

Jess and Finn shared a look but didn’t comment on that.

 

**# # # #**

 

They made it into the air without raising the general alarm at the estate.  It helped that several of the night guards thought that they were doing the right thing.

 

Poe and Finn found themselves back in the TIE floating towards Portsmouth.  Bastian was snoozing at the far end of the basket while Bee turned circles in what Finn could only guess was excitement.

 

“She really is something,” he said, sliding down the side of the basket onto the floor.  He reached up and rubbed his shoulder, groaning.

 

Poe frowned and sat down next to him.  “Should you be here,” he asked.

 

Finn should him an incredulous look.

 

“Right,” Poe said.  “Sorry.”

 

He then shook his head.  “At least…”  He grabbed at Finn’s shoulder, swatting Finn’s hand away.  He very gently started rubbing Finn’s neck.  Finn closed his eyes and leaned back with a contented sigh.  “You’re tense,” Poe said.

 

“You think?”

 

Poe kept rubbing Finn’s neck and then he spotted Finn’s ever-present gloves.  He moved his free hand to one of them.  “Do you ever take these things off?”

 

Finn’s eyes flew open and he jerked away from Poe.  His shoulder erupted into pain.  “Frag,” he spit out.

 

“What the hell, Finn,” Poe said, moving over to help Finn sit back up.  He very deliberately reached for Finn’s hand and then…

 

_No._

 

Poe looked from Finn’s hand to his eyes and back to Finn’s hand.  He shook his head and began pulling off Finn’s glove.

 

“Poe,” Finn choked out.

 

“You’re a cyborg,” Poe whispered, looking at the metal of Finn’s artificial hand glisten in the moonlight.

 

Finn sucked in a deep breath, snatched his glove from Poe and stood up.  “Right hand and lower part of my left leg.  Accident when I was a kid.  And then an experiment for the Order.”  He pulled the glove back on.

 

“Why didn’t you…”  Poe stood up next to him.

 

“Most people don’t take too kindly to cyborgs, Poe.  But I figure an ex-First Order trooper who’s also a cyborg?  They’ll run me out of the Resistance.  Frag, they’ll run me out of England.”

 

“Finn, you can’t really think that—”

 

“Poe, do not try to sell me some fairy tale where no one is going to care.  It’s taken me two years to claw my way up in the Resistance and there are still those who don’t trust me.  And this,” he said, holding up his gloved hand.  “This is a deal breaker.”

 

“But Finn…”

 

“Just get some sleep, Poe,” Finn said, moving towards the other side of the basket.  “We’ll be in Portsmouth soon.”

 

Poe stood there, his mouth hanging open, trying to process what had just happened.

 

**# # # #**

 

The one thing that Rey could count on was that horrible, genocidal organizations like the First Order believed in outdated gender stereotypes and in being unfailingly _polite_.  That would account for why—from the tall masked man who’d managed to grab her at Takodana to the endless parade of flunkies and lackeys who’d been sent to keep an eye on her— none of these idiots had actually bothered to search her.  To lift a genteel lady’s skirt would be the height of incivility.

 

Rey smiled.  _That means you don’t know about my gun._

 

Currently, there was only one lackey in her cell, and he looked decidedly bored.  Or perhaps he thought that a young lady, tied to a wooden chair in the middle of a locked room, was no threat.  Rey shook her head.  _Idiots._

 

She’d spent the better part of the last hour working a small knife out of the back of her corset.  She was now in the process of cutting through the ropes they’d used to tie her in place.  She could feel them starting to give.  _Another ten minutes or so_ , she thought.

 

The door to the cell banged open.  The tall masked man stalked in.  “Out,” he yelled at the lackey, who quickly jumped and scurried away.

 

Rey’s hands froze.

 

“You’ve seen it, haven’t you?”

 

Rey fixed him with as bored a stare as she could muster.  “It’s very hard to hear you with all of that…apparatus on.”

 

The tall man turned and removed the mask.  When he turned back, Rey gasped.  “Ben?”

 

That truly startled him.

 

“How do you know me?”

 

“There’s a portrait of you hanging in your mother’s room.”

 

“She’s not my mother!”

 

Rey fought hard not to roll her eyes.  “She _is_ your mother, and she misses you.”

 

The man surged forward and Rey braced for a slap, but it never came.  Instead, he leaned in until they were practically nose to nose.  “Well, let’s just say that in a day or so, she won’t be my mother.  She won’t be anything.”

 

Rey tensed.  “So you’re going to attack the estate?”

 

“I’m going to blow it up.  But there’s one thing of value there that I need to retrieve first, and you’ve seen it.”

 

Rey raised an eyebrow in question.

 

“The automaton,” Ben yelled.  “Dameron’s machine!”

 

“Oh, Bee.”

 

“Bee?”

 

“BeeBee-Ate,” Rey said confidently.

 

“Tell me about it.”

 

“She’s a BeeBee unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator.  She’s also got an internal self-correcting gyroscopic propulsion system, and—”

 

Ben stalked to the nearest wall and slammed his fist into it, screaming.

 

Rey jumped despite herself and stopped talking.

 

“So he really did it?”

 

Rey tried to look defiant.  “Yes,” she said.

 

He smiled at her.  “Good,” he said.  “Now let’s just hope that you’re important enough to the Resistance to trade for the thing.”

 

“What?”

 

He stalked over towards her, slipping his gloved finger under her chin and forcing her to look him in the eye.  “It’s simple.  The Resistance is supposed to trade us Dameron’s machine for your life.”

 

“They’ll never do it,” Rey said.

 

“You’d better hope they do, or you’ll end up dead.”

 

He turned and stalked out, slamming the door behind him, leaving her alone in the room.

 

Rey immediately began cutting through the ropes in haste.  _They better not make that deal._

 

**# # # #**

 

The TIE landed just outside of Portsmouth and Poe, Finn, and Bastian quickly made their way to the docks.  Bastian and Finn scouted an empty building and then, the three men set up shop.  Bastian fiddled with a mobile communications array while Poe gave Bee instructions.  Finn paced in a corner.  “Can we send her in already?”

 

“Just a minute, Finn,” Poe said, before turning back to Bee and whispering more instructions.

 

Soon enough, the tiny automaton dinged and a piece of paper came feeding out her side.  Poe took it, read it and smiled.  “It’s for you,” he said, handing it to Finn.

 

[Don’t worry.  I’ll find her.]

 

“Thanks, Bee,” Finn said.

 

Bee dinged twice and set off.

 

“Now, we wait,” Poe said, walking over to a device he’d set up to receive remote transmissions from the automaton.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: the penultimate chapter!
> 
> Bee and Rey don't understand the concept of a rescue. Finn enacts a jailbreak. Poe is shocked. Ben yells. And everything starts exploding!


	6. Starkiller

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone ends up in the First Order's warehouse. And there's a weapon besides Ben's rocket that they need to watch out for.

 

“Okay,” Rey said, as she stood up and put her hand on the doorknob.  “Here goes nothing.”

 

She opened the door quickly and quietly, ready to take on a guard or two…and was thoroughly disappointed that there was no one guarding her.  “I’m not _that_ helpless,” she said to the empty hall.  She looked to the right and then the left, finally deciding on the right.      

 

It took her several minutes before she figured out that she was in a warehouse somewhere near the water.  She made her way to the ground floor of the building and crept past what seemed to be hundreds of workers putting together parts for what she assumed were Stormtroopers. 

 

Rey frowned as she realized that these were real, living human beings.  _We always assumed it was automated._

 

Rey soon saw a door that almost certainly led outside, but just when she was about to reach it, it flew open.  Rey froze, lifting her revolver up and getting ready to shoot, when BB-8 came rolling into the building.

 

“Bee,” Rey hissed.  “What are you doing here?”

 

Bee rolled over to her and dinged.

 

“Shhhhhh,” Rey pleaded.  “It’s not safe here.”

 

Bee’s gears were clanking and soon a piece of paper spit out her side.  Rey reached for it.

 

[This is a rescue.]

 

Another piece of paper followed: [Maker-Poe, Friend-Finn, and Friend-Bastian are close by in an empty warehouse].

 

Rey smiled.  “Thank you, Bee.”  She kneeled.  “Are you supposed to take me back?”

 

Bee spun in a circle and dinged.

 

“That’s a yes, isn’t it?”

 

Bee did the same thing again.

 

“Well, before we go, I’d like to find the project that Ben is working on.  I think he means to blow up the estate.”

 

Bee let out a mournful sound.

 

“Exactly,” Rey said.

 

The two of them took off down the hall.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe read the transmission and hooted.  “Yes!”  He turned to Finn and Bastian.  “Bee found Rey and…,” he continued reading, “Oh for kriff’s sake, they’ve gone to find Ben’s machine.”

 

“Kriff,” Finn said.  “Does she not understand the concept of a rescue?”

 

“Bee or Rey?”

 

“Either of them,” Finn said.  “You have coordinates?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, already rising.  “Bastian, tell the others we’re going in.  I’m guessing that we’re going to need a diversion soon.  Perhaps the X-wings could start causing some trouble.”  He and Finn started jogging out of the building.  “But have them lay off on dropping any bombs until we’re sure Rey’s clear.”

 

“Will do, Commander,” Bastian said, already flipping the switches on his comm unit.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey stared through a porthole window into a lab.  “Poe was right,” she whispered.  “It is some kind of rocket.”  She knelt in front of Bee.  “I need you to send these exact coordinates to Poe and then I need you to go find him and tell him what we’ve seen here.” 

 

Bee dinged and a piece of paper printed out.  [What about you?]

 

“I’m going to go see if I can find Ben.”  Her mouth set in a tight line.  “It’s time someone taught him a lesson.”

 

Rey took off down the hall.  Bee zoomed away in the opposite direction.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe and Finn stepped into the warehouse quietly.

 

“Which way,” Poe asked, looking down the long hallway.

 

“Split up,” Finn offered.

 

“Split up.”  Poe nodded grimly.  “Be careful.”

 

Finn smiled.  “You too, Poe.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe pressed his lips together and squared his shoulders.  _I can do this._

 

He crept down a long, dim hallway.  _Just because I haven’t been a soldier in five years doesn’t mean anything.  I’m a capable man._

 

He heard a noise in the next hall.

 

_A perfectly capable man._

 

He frantically searched for a door, an alcove, anywhere to hide.

 

_For the love of Queen and country, just give me something, universe!_

 

The sound was getting closer.

 

_Fragging hell._

 

Poe drew his revolver.

 

_I can do this._

 

He raised it, ready to take aim.

 

BB-8 rounded the corner and froze for a moment before trilling and rolling straight at him.

 

“Bee!” Poe let out a huge breath.  “What are you doing here?”

 

A piece of paper printed: [Looking for you!]

 

“Where’s Rey?”

 

[Looking for Enemy-Ben.]

 

“Kriffing hell!”

 

[Language!]

 

“Sorry, Bee.  It’s just…” Poe licked his lips and closed his eyes.  All of the worry and stress of the past few days hit him, and it hit him hard.

 

Poe fell back against the wall and slid to the ground.  He was having trouble breathing.

 

And then, suddenly, it was five years ago…

 

 

Leia came into his room as he packed.  “Poe, you have to understand what I’m doing here.”

 

“I do, Leia,” Poe said, stuffing clothes in his valise.  “But you have to understand my position.  I can’t—”

 

“It wasn’t your fault, Poe,” she said.

 

Poe spun and snarled, “Fine!  But what about the next time, Leia?  I get that to you, Muran was a capable Balloonist and a good soldier.  To me?  Well, to me, he was the closest thing I’ve ever had to a husband.  And I can’t stay here and watch you send people like him off to their deaths.  I can’t do it!  And I sure as hell can’t be complicit in it!  I’m not going to order a bunch of kids off to face almost certain doom…”  Leia opened her mouth to interject but he kept going, “And I’m well aware that war is coming, ma’am.  You’ve said it often enough, and I believe you.”  He sunk onto his bed.  “I just…”  He looked up at her.  “These people are more than soldiers to me.  They’re my friends.  Hell, they’re my family, and I just…”  He stood and shook his head, turning back to the valise.  “I’ll be gone in the morning, Leia.”

 

She hesitated, but then she simply said, “Safe travels, Poe.”

 

Poe turned as she walked to the door.  “Good luck, ma’am.”

 

She smiled at him.

 

“Really,” Poe said…

 

 

Poe blinked, realizing that Bee was spinning and dinging at his feet.  He was panting and sweating.  “What is it, Bee?”

 

He saw a piece of paper and pulled it.  [Maker-Poe?  Are you well?]

 

He let out a long breath and pushed himself up on shaky legs.  “Yeah, Bee, I’m fine.”  _Just have to keep a bunch of kids from getting themselves killed._

 

He sighed.  “Do you think you can find Rey for me?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn tried not to let the sight of hundreds of people hunched over building Stormtroopers make him sick, but he couldn’t help himself.  He frowned as he noted that they were chained to their stations.  _New security precaution_ , he thought to himself.  _Probably installed after a certain trooper broke rank and escaped_.  He squeezed his eyes shut and tried not to mix guilt with his nausea. 

 

He studied the set up.  One lock per row and it looked to be nothing fancy.  He pulled a metal rod out of his boot.  _Please let this work._

 

He crept into the main assembly room, avoiding the Stormtroopers guarding the place, and made his way over to the end of a long table where a young woman sat shining new Stormtrooper helmets.  “Pssst,” he hissed.  The woman looked down, her eyes growing wide.  Finn shook his head and pressed his lips together.  She understood, seemingly going back to her work.  Finn worked the rod into the keyhole and twisted and soon there was a pop.  The lock fell open.

 

The woman looked down, relief washing over her face.  Finn whispered.  “Help the others.  Get everyone out of here.  The Resistance is going to bomb this place soon.  Understood?”

 

She nodded.  He handed her the rod and crept away.

 

**# # # #**

 

It wasn’t Rey, but it was definitely Ben’s rocket.

 

“Kriff,” Poe whispered, looking into the lab.  “Whatever that thing is, it’s beautiful.”  _And it’s probably going to kill a lot of people._   Poe looked down at BB-8.  “Stay out here and warn me if you see anyone coming, okay?”

 

Bee spun in a circle and dinged.  A piece of paper printed out.  [What are you going to do?]

 

“I’m going to dismantle that thing.” 

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn held his revolver out as he crept down the hall.  He’d steadied his breathing and was straining to hear something, anything, that would tell him if anyone was going to be standing around the next corner.  _Only one way to find out._   He took in a breath and turned…

 

…only to come face to face with a gun. 

 

Before he could fire, a voice squeaked out, “Finn?”

 

Finn lowered his gun.  “Rey?”  He grabbed her into a big hug.

 

“You came for me,” she said.

 

“Of course, we came for you.  You and Bee don’t seem to grasp what a rescue is, though,” he said, stepping back and scanning the space.  “Where is Bee?”

 

Rey smiled.  “She went to find Poe. And…”  She saw the sling.  “Are you well?”

 

“It’s nothing.”

 

Rey lifted an eyebrow at that.

 

“Okay, fine, it’s something, but...”  He looked up and down the hall.  “What are you doing, Rey?”

 

“Trying to find Ben Solo.”

 

“Why?”

 

Rey’s look turned almost feral.  “Because he broke his mother’s heart and hurt Poe’s feelings and he tied me to a chair.”

 

Finn fought hard not to roll his eyes.  “So, you were just going to take him on all by yourself?”

 

“You don’t think I can handle him?”

 

Finn smiled.  “I’m sure you could.  Still doesn’t hurt to have a little back up.”

 

“Does that mean?”

 

“Lead the way,” Finn said.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Any idea when we can start bombing the warehouse,” Snap yelled into his communications device.

 

“Not yet,” came Bastian’s tinny-sounding voice.  “I’ve lost all contact with Poe and Finn…and Bee and Rey.”

 

“Kriff,” Jess yelled.  “What in the frag are they doing down there?”

 

Karé barked, “On your six, Iolo.”

 

“See it,” he yelled back.

 

“Someone find Poe and Finn and give us the signal to start bombing.  There are way too many TIEs up here, and…”  Karé’s comm cut out for a moment in a blaze of static.

 

“Karé,” Bastian screamed.

 

“Still here,” she yelled.  “We need clearance or we’re going to start having a lot of collateral damage.”  She looked out over the city, hoping the TIEs they were shooting down weren’t causing too much harm.

 

“Copy that,” Bastian said.  “As soon as I hear something…”

 

“We may have to make that decision for you,” Snap yelled.  “I’ve got a Star Destroyer coming in from the east.”

 

“Kriff,” yelled Iolo.  “Get Poe and the others out of there now!”

 

**# # # #**

 

Bee was dinging so loudly, it sounded like screaming.  Poe jumped up, hitting his head on the underside of Ben’s rocket.  He stumbled forward.  “Buddy, what is it?”

 

“Poe Dameron,” Ben Solo growled from the doorway.

 

“Ben,” Poe said, straightening.  He scanned the space for BB-8.

 

“Your little automaton just rolled away,” Ben said, peering back into the hallway.  “No matter.  I have every Stormtrooper in the facility programmed to find it and bring it to me.”

 

Poe smiled.  “You’ll be surprised how resourceful she can be.”

 

Ben sneered and walked in, locking the door behind him.  “Although it occurs to me that we don’t even really need the automaton if we have the man who built it.”

 

Poe pulled his gun, but before he could get a shot off, a long rod sprung from Ben’s sleeves.  Ben pointed it at Poe and a beautiful red coronal discharge snaked through the air, hitting Poe square in the chest.

 

Poe screamed, falling backward.  As soon as he hit the ground, he began crawling away.  Ben cackled and hit him with another charge of electricity.  And then another.

 

Poe stopped moving, curling up into a tight ball on the ground below Ben’s rocket. 

 

“You like it,” Ben asked.  “One of my more recent inventions.  I call it an ionic discharge device.  Snoke thinks I should call it something more arresting.”  He laughed.  “Maybe a _light-saber_?”

 

Poe whimpered.

 

Ben kneeled down next to him.  “We’re going to find the girl, and then I’m going to take you and her to our facility in the Alps where your genius is finally going to do something useful, like serve me.”

 

“I will never—”

 

Ben hit him with another charge.  Poe writhed in pain.

 

“Stop,” Finn yelled, kicking in the door and bursting into the room.

 

Ben spun.  “Traitor!”

 

“So you do remember me?”  Finn smiled as Rey and BB-8 joined him in the doorway.

 

“And I’m going to have the pleasure of killing you!”  He aimed the rod.

 

Poe screamed.  “Move!”

 

Finn and Rey ducked behind a table as sparks went flying across the room. 

 

BB-8 rolled straight at Ben, clearly intending to ram him.  Poe screamed “Bee, no!” a moment too late.  Ben aimed the coil and Bee lit up in branching purple light.  The automaton squealed before rolling to a stop.

 

Poe pushed himself up.  “I’ll kill you, you—”

 

Ben spun to aim at Poe, and Finn and Rey were already up and moving.  Ben turned back towards them, shooting a charge at Finn, who threw his hand up in protection.  He yelled in pain as his hand sparked and its gears stopped turning. 

 

With Ben’s attention centered on Finn, Rey aimed and fired a perfect shot.  Ben screamed as a bullet hit his shoulder.  Poe got up and bent low, catching Ben’s knees and forcing him to the ground.  Ben’s eyes fluttered shut as Poe rolled off him.

 

Rey ran over.  “Poe, are you okay?”

 

Poe nodded, already running for Bee and kneeling in front of her.  “I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispered.  He leaned his head against the still warm metal of her dome.  “This is all my fault.”

 

Rey knelt beside Poe.  “It’s Ben’s fault, Poe.”

 

He looked at her and nodded.  She put a hand on his shoulder.  “And we can fix her.  I promise.”

 

Finn held his damaged hand to his chest.  His heart broke for Poe, but then out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ben’s eyes open. 

 

It was happening as if it were in slow motion: Finn watched Ben produce a revolver and aim it at Poe’s head.

 

Finn only had time to scream as he jumped in between Ben and Poe.

 

Poe heard the shot and jumped, and then he heard the sickening thud of a body.  He spun, his eyes wide as he saw Finn on the floor behind him and realized what had happened.

 

Ben was already pushing himself up and aiming again.

 

Rey didn’t hesitate.  She fired at Ben.

 

He rolled to the side.

 

She fired again.

 

Poe jumped over Finn to protect him from ricochets. 

 

Suddenly, the whole facility shook and they heard an explosion.

 

Ben, bloody and wheezing, stood up and screamed, “This isn’t over!”  He stumbled out a back door with Rey in close pursuit.

 

“Rey,” Poe yelled.  “Leave him.  We have to get Finn and Bee out of here!”

 

Rey ran back in.  “What about the rocket?”

 

“I think I dismantled it.”

 

“You _think_?”

 

“Well, right now, that will have to do,” he said, hoisting Finn up into his arms.  “Can you get Bee?”

 

Rey nodded as another explosion rocked the building.  “Why are they shooting at us?”

 

“I’m guessing the Order would rather destroy this place than see it fall into our hands.”  _Either that_ , Poe thought, _or Leia decided to destroy the place with you still in it_.  He kept that thought to himself.

 

They slowly made their way out of the crumbling building, both praying the structure would hold until they were outside.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the next chapter, the end of our tale and the aftermath of Starkiller...


	7. Coming Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our tale comes to an end with a quick misunderstanding, some new hardware, and a group of X-wing pilots plotting to make Poe and Finn happy.

 

Finn gasped and opened his eyes, suddenly awake.  A hand reached over.  “It’s okay, Finn.  You’re okay.”

 

“Rey,” he breathed out.  Finn searched the room, but no one else was there.  He frowned and started trying to sit up.

 

“Finn, will you…”  Rey rose and started trying to help him.  “Could you just…”  She swatted his arm.  “Please be careful.”

 

Finn grumbled, “Fine.”  He let Rey adjust the pillows and help him up.  When he was sitting, he said, “Where is he?”

 

“Poe?”  Rey frowned.  “He isn’t here.  He had to—”

 

Finn shook his head.  “No.  I don’t need to hear it.”  Rey opened her mouth.  Finn put up his hand.  “If he doesn’t want to be here, I can’t force him to—”

 

“If you would just give me a moment, I was going to tell you that he had to go back to home to take care of some things.”

 

“He went back to Italy?”

 

“No, Finn.  His home here.  Yavin House.  To see his father.”

 

“Yavin House,” Finn repeated.  “To see his father.”  Finn smiled, suddenly remembering the file on Poe: his father, _Sergeant Kes Dameron_.  “The Sergeant.”

 

“He should be back later today.”

 

There was a clanging and a ding next to the bed.  Finn leaned over to spy BB-8 staring up at him.  She printed a piece of paper.  Rey reached over and handed it to Finn.

 

[Maker-Poe is going to be mad he wasn’t here when you woke up.]

 

Rey nodded.  “He wanted to put it off, but when his father heard he was back…”  Rey bit her lip.  “There was a very terse telegram.”

 

Bee dinged.  Rey pulled up another paper and laughed as she read it.

 

“What’d Bee say,” Finn asked.

 

Rey handed the slip of paper over.  [Father-Kes is pissed.]

 

Finn laughed and then immediately regretted it.  “Ow,” he said. 

 

Rey got up.  “I should tell Doctor Kalonia that you’re awake.”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said.  “That might be a good idea.”

 

As Rey left the room, Finn looked down at his right hand.  He’d remembered the damage Ben had done, but now…  _It looks brand new_.  He tried each finger in succession—it was far quieter and smoother than he remembered it ever being before.  He turned it and twisted it and as the silver metal caught the light, he realized he was looking at something so far beyond his old, clunky hand.  “Bee,” he asked.  “Did Poe…”

 

The automaton dinged and he heard a piece of paper print out.  He started to lean over for it but the pain was too much.  But as soon as Rey, Dr. Kalonia, and the General came in, he nodded towards Bee.  “Can one of you give me that, please?”

 

Rey walked over and pulled the slip out, handing it to Finn.

 

[Maker-Poe wanted to surprise you.]

 

Finn smiled.

 

Dr. Kalonia said, “Well, I guess that means you aren’t in too much pain?”

 

“It’s not too bad,” Finn said.

 

Rey rolled her eyes.  “He’s being brave, doctor.”

 

The doctor nodded.  “I figured.”  She started rummaging through her bag.

 

The General sat at the foot of Finn’s bed.  “That’s nice,” she said, nodding towards Finn’s hand.

 

He suddenly remembered.  He jerked it under the sheets.

 

The General looked concerned.  “Finn, you don’t think we’re upset that you’re a cyborg do you?”

 

“Most people are,” he said.

 

Leia shook her head.  “And most people are content to let groups like the First Order trample all over them.  We aren’t most people.”

 

Finn looked up.  She was wearing a warm smile.  “May I see?”

 

Finn slowly pulled his hand out.  Leia walked over and carefully took it in her hands.  “Poe does good work,” she said, examining it. 

 

Rey moved so that she could see it too.  “It’s beautiful,” she whispered.

 

The doctor cleared her throat.  “If we’re finished cooing over Finn’s hand, I’d like to examine my patient.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn had been dozing when he heard someone come in the room.  There were muffled voices and then he could hear Rey and BB-8 leave.  He opened his eyes, realizing it had to be late afternoon.

 

Poe walked towards the bed.  “Hi, buddy,” he said.  “I hear I missed you waking up.”

 

Finn licked his lips.  “Yeah.  And I hear I missed your father’s telegram.”

 

“Oh,” Poe chuckled, sitting on the edge of the bed.  “They told you about that?”

 

“Mmmm-hmmmm,” Finn said.  “Bee said your father was livid.”

 

“I’m sure that’s not the word Bee used,” Poe said.

 

“Maybe not,” Finn said.  He smiled.  “So, you’re still here?”

 

“Where else would I be?”

  
“I had it on good authority that you weren’t back, that you were leaving as soon as we finished the mission.”

 

Poe shrugged.  “I don’t know what to tell you, buddy.  You got some bad intel on that one.”  He smiled a sly smile.  “Besides, the mission’s not finished.  Ben got away.”

 

Finn frowned. 

 

“Hey, hey, hey!  No!  I didn’t mean to make you frown,” Poe said, sliding forward.  “Only meant that I can’t leave yet.”

 

“Yet?”

 

Poe stared up at the ceiling.  “I can’t win with this one!”  He looked back at Finn.  “Fine, what do you want?”

 

“I want to know if you’re back to stay.”

 

“The General reinstated me this morning,” Poe said. 

 

“Why,” Finn asked.

 

“Why did she reinstate me?”

 

“No, Poe,” Finn said.  “Why are you staying?”

 

Poe chewed on his lip.  Finn tried not to find that too distracting. 

 

Finally, Poe said, “I’m staying because Ben’s still out there and we need to stop him, and I’m staying because there are good people here who need my help.  And because I think Leia needs people here who disagree with her, people who don’t think all of this is a clear-cut black-and-white issue.  And…”  He looked down at his shoes.  “And because I’d like to believe it wasn’t my fault.”

 

“It wasn’t, Poe,” Finn said.  He really wished he could reach out and pull Poe towards him.

 

After a moment, Poe wiped his eyes and turned to Finn.  “So, how is the new hand?”

 

“Great,” Finn said, flexing his new fingers.  “It’s beautiful,” he said softly, and then catching himself, “And, uh, it’s far more responsive than before.” 

 

“Good,” Poe said.  “I was hoping you’d like it.”

 

They stared at each other, smiling, until it turned awkward.

 

Poe felt it first.  He blushed and then rubbed his hand across the back of his neck.  “So, ummmmm….”  _Say something, you idiot!  Anything!_

 

Finn watched him expectantly.  _Say something, you idiot_ , he begged Poe in his mind.  _Anything!_

 

“Ummmmm,” he said.  _Oh kriff_.  “Maybe I should go?”  Poe started to rise.  _Tell me to stay, Finn!_

 

“Uhhhh, okay.  I guess?”  Finn watched Poe get up and start for the door.  “Or?”

 

“Or,” Poe repeated quickly, spinning back towards Finn.

 

“Or you could stay?”

 

Poe broke into an easy smile.  “I’d like that.”  This time, he sat much closer to Finn. 

 

Finn grinned up at the inventor.  “So tell me what happened with your father.”

 

“Oh,” Poe said.  “That is quite a story.”  He leaned forward…

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey stared through the crack in the door.

 

“Anything,” Jess asked.

 

Rey shook her head and then turned back.  “He’s talking about his trip to Yavin House.”

 

Snap chuckled from his spot across the hall.  “I bet Kes harangued him within an inch of his life.”

 

“No,” Karé said.  “The Sergeant is more the type to use disappointment and guilt.”

 

Iolo tried to imitate Kes Dameron’s voice: “Poe, it’s not that I’m mad.  I’m just disappointed.”

 

Jess laughed.  “Yep.  That’s it.”  She turned back to Rey.  “Anything?”

 

Rey shook her head.  “These two are clueless.”

 

“So, we’ll have to help them along,” Snap said, pushing off from the wall and walking towards the stairs.  The others started to follow.  “Any ideas?”

 

Jess pulled Rey from the door.  “Don’t worry.  We’ll come up with something,” she said, entwining her fingers with Rey’s. 

 

Rey smiled, staring at their hands, as Jess pulled her down the staircase.

 

**# # # #**

 

A week later, Dr. Kalonia allowed Finn to leave bed.  He was supposed to take it easy, but after a week cooped up in his room, he was ready to run as far away from the main house as possible.  Dr. Kalonia had insisted on a wheelchair, though, but Rey and Poe had immediately turned up their noses at the wicker one she produced.  So, a day after Finn was cleared for light exercise, they unveiled their automated wheelchair. 

 

Finn worked hard to look sufficiently impressed.  “Thanks,” he said tentatively.  _That thing is going to kill me._

 

“Finn,” Rey said.  “It’s not that bad!”

 

“Yeah, buddy.  I promise, it’s safe,” Poe said, maneuvering the chair to the side of Finn’s bed.  Finn gave him a questioning look.  “I promise, Finn.”

 

Finn nodded and moved into the chair.  Rey pointed out what all the buttons and levers did and a few minutes later, Finn was navigating the chair out of the room.

 

At the top of the stairs, he paused.  “Um, Rey, Poe, stairs.”

 

“We know,” Rey said with a peculiar glint in her eyes.

 

“Press the button on the side of the chair,” Poe said.

 

Finn turned to look at them with a frown.

 

“Press it,” they said.

 

He did and the chair began to hover a few inches.  Finn let out a yelp. 

 

“Now, just go down as usual,” Rey said.

 

“Usual,” Finn managed.  “Right.”

 

He somehow made it down the stairs, promising himself that he’d never do that again.  Then, he pressed the button on the side of the chair and it floated back onto the ground.  “Never ever tell me how you two managed that.”

 

“Well actually,” Rey started.

 

“Never ever,” Finn repeated.

 

Poe laughed.  “Come on, let’s go outside.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They made their way to a small pond at the back of the estate where Jess, Iolo, Snap, and Karé were waiting.  They’d set out a blanket and a picnic. 

 

Finn’s face lit up.  He turned to Poe.  “A picnic?”

 

Poe looked confused.  He turned to Rey.  _What is this?_   “I’m just surprised as you are, buddy.”

 

“We thought it would be fun,” Rey said.

 

Poe lifted an eyebrow.  In his short time back with the Resistance, he’d learned that Rey was just as sneaky as Jess and the others, and he didn’t trust how innocent she looked right now.

 

When they got to the blanket, Poe helped Finn off the chair and onto the ground.  “How are you feeling,” he asked.

 

“Great,” Finn said.

 

“Really?”

 

Finn chuckled.  “Yes, mother.  I promise.”

 

Poe turned to ask Jess if there was a second blanket.  _This one is awfully small._   When he looked around, though, he discovered that everyone else had disappeared.  “Oh you sneaky, little—”

 

“What is it, Poe,” Finn asked.

 

“We’ve been abandoned.”

 

Finn looked around.  “Hey, where did they go?”

 

Poe shrugged.  He nodded towards a wooded area just to their left.  “Probably hiding in the trees.”

 

“Hiding?”

 

He shouted, “Yes, hiding because they can’t come out here and face me like men…or women!”

 

“Am I missing something,” Finn asked.

 

Poe blushed.  He opened his mouth and then closed it.  He picked up a decanter.  “Something to drink?”

 

“Poe,” Finn said.  “Don’t change the subject.”

 

Poe sighed.  “Damn you, Testor.  I am going to pay you back for this,” he grumbled.

 

Finn raised an eyebrow, waiting for a coherent response.

 

“Fine,” Poe said.  He gestured to the picnic and the lake.  “They’ve set us up.”

 

“Set us up?”

 

“A romantic picnic just for two?”

 

“Oh,” Finn said.  And then, “OH” as it sunk in.  _They know?  How do they know how I feel about him?  Oh kriffing hell.  That’s why he’s so mad._   “Look, Poe,” Finn started.

 

“Finn,” Poe started at the same time.  Poe laughed nervously.  “You first.”

 

“No.  No, you first.”

 

Poe’s blush deepened.  “Look, buddy.  It’s nothing.  Just a trifle.  I’m sure these feelings will go away in time.  I mean…”  He looked down at the assorted fruits and cheeses laid out upon the blanket.

 

Finn’s heart sank.  _Of course, he isn’t interested.  Why would he be?  I’m just an injured cyborg and I don’t even know how to fly._   He stared out at the lake.  “I understand,” he said, picking up a rock and flinging it into the water.

 

“Look, don’t worry,” Poe said.  “I won’t bother you.” He dusted off his pants.  “I won’t make it awkward.  I’m sure this will all go away in—”

 

“I understand, Poe,” Finn said, with just a bit too much force.  “You aren’t interested.  You really don’t have to keep telling me—”

 

“Wait, what?”

 

“I said, I understand that you aren’t interested in me and that—”

 

“Wait, what?”

 

“Poe,” Finn growled.  “Do not make me say that again.”

 

“What do you mean I’m not interested in you?”

 

“That’s what you’ve been saying for the past few minutes, and I get it.  Really, I do,” Finn said, throwing another rock at the water.

 

“What are you talking about?  I’ve been apologizing for _my_ feelings for _you_.”

 

Finn stopped breathing, and for a moment, the whole world stopped moving.  Then, he licked his lips and slowly turned towards Poe.  “Wait, what?”

 

Poe burst into a huge smile.  “I’ve been apologizing for _my_ feelings for _you_.”

 

“Your feelings for me?”

 

“Ummmmm-hmmmm,” Poe said, leaning forward.  “My horrible, soul-crushing, all-consuming feelings for you.”

 

“Me,” Finn repeated, leaning towards Poe.

 

“You,” Poe said.  They were practically nose to nose.

 

“So I should probably stop apologizing for my hopeless, paralyzing, all-consuming feelings for you,” Finn whispered.

 

“Probably,” Poe said, closing the gap between them and pressing his lips onto Finn’s.

 

Finn closed his eyes and his entire body lit up in flames.  His hands found Poe’s jacket and pulled him in.  Poe moaned as the kiss turned from light and sweet into something decidedly more insistent.

 

Neither of them heard as the others tramped back over to the picnic spot and spread out a second blanket.

 

“Told you our plans are good,” Jess said, bumping her shoulder into Rey’s. 

 

Rey smiled, popping a grape into her mouth and sitting down. 

 

“Commander,” Snap said.  “Commander!  Are you two coming back to us anytime soon?”

 

Poe reluctantly pulled away from Finn.  “Snap, just eat your food, would you?”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Finn tugged at Poe as the rest of the group dug into the picnic basket.  “Good to have you back, Commander,” he whispered against Poe’s lips.

 

“Good to be back,” Poe murmured as he pressed in for another kiss.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all of you who took the time to read this! I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> And special thanks to [@the-pudding-is-a-lie for the FANTASTIC piece of art that inspired this whole thing](http://the-pudding-is-a-lie.tumblr.com/post/158516691287/so-i-finally-managed-to-finish-my-contribution).

**Author's Note:**

> As always, comments and kudos make my day. They are truly appreciated.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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